Last night after I wrote my blog"Is this where I Surrender?" or I think that's what I labeled it,LOL..I returned to my room after doing Joshuas homework with him. I never do this as I stink at it but apparently not last night as he said to me "Mom how do you know all this? Is there anything you don't know? You know TOO MUCH!" ...I almost peed my pants withlaughter as IF he only knew...of course he knows I did not finish school...
Ok, I have had it literally....The kindness is overwhelming & the email from Shane moved me to THINK but itis the flipping TV ( TBS) That is airing Wizard of OZ right now that literally drove me back on as I watched the wicked witch ride the bike around in the storm while the house turned round and round. Everyone has people or events that represent the wicked witch & for ME fighting evil seems to be a life long game the Universe plays bu...
This was found when I asked something I can not tell you. But this was the answer to it. It will be the gift I leave you with......Hugs,Laura Howe and Baby Reggie ...
Anyone that has read pretty much any of my stuff would agree that I have long asked the question of why people lie or taint the truth or hide thr truth or decieve...why some are afraid to speak thier mind and things of that nature or even "conform" to others beliefs unknowingly or wantingly at times. But TODAY I was listening to a morningradio talk show that can be found onWNYC~RadioLab: Deception( Feb08) I will TRY to add it but it cra...
I have cried more with tears of...not sure what you call tears when people love you??? Tears of joy or tears of love? But anyways I look a mess as my eyes are swollen at this point...I love everyone of you and I am going to do this as I feel you are all right and we only need to reflect which is easy when you LIVED IT! LOL....I love you guys with all my heart and I am adding this for you tonight....Goodnight my wonderful awesome and beautiful FRI...
Well as I sit here with tears in my eyes I better tell you all now I guess I CAN'T finish this challege as you ALL KNOW my computer is NOT my one that I used thru out this whole time and NONE of the stuff on it is from now as it is a neighbors computer and pieces from others around the house ! I JUST learned with a thread that you need to add all assignments in a packet to Bill? I could not possibly retrievethem as that tower is total history,har...
Sounds like a crazy title huh? Good as a little crazy mixed with saneness is what this world just might need. Yesterday and even this am I could not find the words to add a blog. I actually thought I would just stop blogging. No reason...just no thoughts to add to this year and 3 months of adding and adding and adding....But then I remembered the words of Carlo....Carlo is a great Transformer,he helped my son Josh last year make the weight limit ...
People might laugh at me at times that I connect with God or spirits at times. I laugh too as it is really weird but since I have no medication of any kind and am as sane as sane comes I imagine there are things we just can't EXPLAIN YET...As many understand from my last blog Iam bothered...I asked God for a answer..let it be came into my head and I said THAT is NOT the ANSWER...as I know better than to circum to pressure when right is right ,I w...
Many here understand more about my life than others and I feel silly repeating myself. So I will say this only today...I have lived just about every aspect of life you want to imagine and some you don't...I have gathered life lessons and a UNIQUE PROSPECTIVE this way. I am very intelligent even with very little schooling since my drowning in the 2nd grade where I never "caught up" and my moving on to the streets just before my 12th birt...
My earlier blog was supposed to have this added at the end of it but I messed up. LOL...It is OK as I wanted to also add this picture...How many know what this picture represents? I wonder....I will tell you another day but today I wonder how many have seen this before? ......Ok it is God...I thought it was beautiful.....I add it and these words of inspiration today and I hope you enjoy them as I do....Hugs,Laura oxxooxxo ...
I have never really done well with contests or things of a nature where people are seperated. It comes from many things I believe and my inner voice and knowledge at times does not allow me the blinders some have. I see everything and I question EVERYTHING..it is a silly existance actually as I get answers but I look constantly for many more answers. I am a visionary of sorts I think as my vision stays true all the time but yet I always question ...
I have only 1 real dream...Peace...but a peace that resinates from our hearts that leads us to our own potential as our own beings that we unite then will all of mankind as we realize the full potential for peace and oneness. I feel strongly that Transformation gives us these tools to help us discover the best "us" possible. Therefore there are no winners or losers as being the best "us" is a achievement only we can bring to o...
I went to my friend & clients Ellens this am and she has known me 25 yrs..she says to me as soon as she see's me.."You are pregnant"..I can tell..I have goosebumps...she said I thought this the other day on the phone to you and told George,Laura is pregnant but seeing you I am sure..I am gonna grab you a pregnacy test atthe office as you are pregant.Well all I went there for was to CLEAN...LOL.... I told her she was funny and yet ma...
Today I started this blog twice already. The first one I earsed and the 2nd I was interupted just as I asked a querstion..the question was WHY...My dogs heard this knock that was a simple 2 knocks seperated by about 5 seconds. They were loud enough my husband heard them thru the surround sound TV he was listening to behind the bedroom door as the dogs and I were in Josh's room on the computer. The dogs flew downstairs and I as well and NO ONE was...
Thank you for your service and sacrifices today and always. May 1 day there be PEACE across the land.... ...
Seems the more life challenges me the more fun I have. Today I got MORE done than days I feel well! LOL...I even came home ,threw in a chicken dinner ,2 actually as both birds needed cooking since I got them at the butcher 3 days ago now. I wanted to have them yesterday,LOL...Then I went BACK to Annies and finished painting the doors and came home ,ate the supper and then decided out of the blue to make my first completely homemade Pumpkin Pie,wh...
Yesterday all of a sudden I thought the room was spinning,then I laid down as I was on the site typing away..I told Scott I had some aweful thing that I felt like I was gonna die or morning sickness. He said Yeah Right...I proceeded to go down stairs where I barley made it to the hall before the bathroom and spray painted EVERYTHING with projectile ,well you KNOW! I could barely yell ,Scott...I need help...He was so funny he came downstairs and w...
I do not think this one works.I can't view it properly on You Tube but I need to check it out her as Jill says she will fix anything later when I go there. This was the more important video because I was really exercising hard with a huge hill that felt like Mt Everest! LOL...I hope it works but if not Jill is a genious with this stuff! Plus HER computer WORKS! LOL....Go Pats! Just kidding Pete ! LOL ...
This is just random as I found it fasinating...This is the inside of a friend of mines company jet..they rent these bad boys at Jetsetters in FLA and she works for them. This is just 1 of a ton they own..but this struck me as THE LIFE ! LOL...Who has a jet like this ...CRAZY ! I might enjoy flying if this was the way ! LOL ~ Hugs,Laura ..P.S..later I am gonna add a video of me &Baby Reggie WORKING OUT! LOL....I can't add ANYTHING on this comp...
Always have friends owe you money. I had someone owe me a ton of money for a long time....years in fact. They have made 1 payment and finally yesterday made another ! I went right down and had my stuff turned back on. I am trilled and only hope they will pay the rest of the $10,000 yes that was TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS that they owe me and then maybe I could really pay some serious bills! LOL....It stinks to be owed money and be broke but it sure doe...
I hope this works , this is the video my girlfreind Jill was kind enough to add for me on Baby Reggie and I at out favorite place..Ames Knowel park a 5 min drive from our home. We go here daily to hike and play. I also should tell you all that this am my computer and Tv and phone was shut off so I am at Jills adding this. I spent too much money in Tenn so the bill just can't be paid this month..LOL....I will try to get to the libary and stay upda...
Countless times I have sat here in front of this computer or in my home and cried or wondered "Will we ever have World Peace ? " It was starting to seem more impossible everyday. I follow all world politics, as we live in a Global Society ,we are too small minded when we think of only America,we need to expand out views and thinking. Many times it is HARD to really understand what is going on in the world or I should say FACE what is go...
Today we VOTE and this is HUGE for me as my hubby was very predjudice when I met him as this is just how he grew up in this enviroment. Today he & I VOTE for Obama..I do not CARE who you vote for as we live in America but my belief is Obama can CHANGE the direction this world is going as he has BEEN THERE..he has seen BOTH sides! Much of MY experience in life and WHY my life in many ways is so successful for a child of the streets and a unedu...
The other day I was down cellar doing laundry and while waiting for the buzzer to go off I noticed this disgusting book all crumpled sitting on the book shelf. I thought,what the nech is that mess.I then decided who cares but was drawn to it. I finally said ok I will look at it. As it really looks like a piece of JUNK! Well I take it off the shelf and it says Attitude on the front and it is a composition/journal so it says on the front. I open it...
Can you say in the trash broke ? Scott has spent half the day putting together pieces of borrowed computers from the neighbors to make this one work enough to do my buiss on it and to come on here and TRY to do stuff..it is very hard but nothing I can't deal with ..but I have foster care coming in the am for the inspection of the fire stuff and codes etc..I will hopefully be back soon but I have so much I can't explain with this new broke compute...
Yesterday as I was getting ready to go with Scott & the dogs to borrow my girlfriends Jills video camera I heard the dogs barking and a voice calling "Laura". I was surprised to see my friend Kim whom I haven't seen in a while and the last time was when she came buy to ask if I would sell her nephew Frank a Boxer puppy. Which I did and Kim's dad came with him and they tell me (Kim & her m...
HAPPY HALLOWEEN ! TRICK OR TREAT BUT NO FATTENING MEAT ! CHOOSE YOU TREATS WISELY! LOLHUGS AND BOO ~ LAURA,SCOTT,RYAN,JOSHUA AND( THE DOGS) BABY REGGIE,MYRIA,HARLEY,HUMPHREY BOGART,SUMMER,JASMINE,BUSTER,SAFFRON,LUCKY THE RABBIT, AND HERMAN & CHARLIE THE RATS ! BOO ...
In the past I have mentioned how much I do not like winter. It reminds my brain of living on the steets as a kid and I can still feel the cold in my bones while in a warm house. Well KNOWING I have oil in the tank but no hot water is really not striking a good cord with me this am. Dude says AVOID negitivity like the plague so I am thinking positive about this whole thing. Broken water heater or whatever can't spoil my fun ! I will still celebrat...
I for many years swam upstream. It is why I am so strong now ,LOL...But now I need not fight anymore as it is smooth sailing downstream ! Come Join ME! ~Hugs,Laura xoxoxoxoxoxo...
I do not care who you vote for or what your views are. I hope that no one votes based on predjudices of EITHER candidate. As predjudice is not ACCEPTABLE in ANY form under Gods watch. I also hope no one based thier vote on someone atire or sex. And I certainly PRAY everyone really RESEARCHED the FACTS and picks the best candidate for them based on FACTS not FEAR or BELIEFS but real FACTS. We have a basic right here that at times HAS dissapointed ...
My life these days as winter fast approaches is a bit ...hmmmm...BUSY! As if I do not make the mola to pay the bills we will be in the coola with no oil ! LOL... I also have the last stage of Foster stuff to do. I work for myself and I make my own time and hours but I need to police myself as I get carried away in the LOVE for this place! I ENJOY the sheer JOY of the PEOPLE,the ideas,the facts and the LOVE...Kindness is awesome too! I have no &qu...
No time to really write anytrhing but I show up as I make myself accountable in this way...here is my add for the day or atleast until later ,lol...I love this song! It just makes me feel happy ! Hugs,Laura ...
My mother and I have not spent very much time together in my lifetime and one of the reasons ,as there were many,is she spent some time running around the country and Englad with the Beatles. I can't get into more details on a public blog but I will say that she was very involved with a member but not a member of the band but the 5th Beatle. Anyone who really knows the Beatles knows now who I am speaking of. I will not answer guesses th...
I wanted to share this story with people... I have my entire life "felt" the pains and trails of others. It has mostly felt like the WORLD is ON MY SHOULDERS. I TRY to ease that now a bit but it is so engrained in me I can't help it as it is how I was wired at birth I guess ? I long stood even as a young child to stand up for others rights and to help others if at all possible at any cost almost. Living on the streets I guess it wa...
I think nothing on Earth is better than a gift of kindness,love and understanding from another. I recieved this gift not once this am but 3 different times and each time moved me but the latter of them to tears. I felt a renewed HOPE for humanity and a brighter day ahead. I guess the issue is not all those who I will witness in life being on "thier" path but how much I BELIEVE IN MINE. How STRONG I am in times that are challe...
I do not think I like being intuitive very much. It makes it hard for me to understand people as they say one thing and do another and this CONSTANT wanting to be something or want something makes me half crazy. I do not understand DIVISIONS of PEOPLE and I do not understand pushing your beliefs on others and I do not understand why life has gotten to this point. It almost seems like Earth is the hell we are tested with before we go to Heave...
This is kinda odd and kinda weird but I got a letter yesterday that says this.....This is the heading and then the subject matter is below ,if thats the proper word for it all..LOL"Laura,please forgive us but we have taken a closer look at your profile. It turns out you're more special than any of us imagined! Did you know you possess some very rare,hidden traits? In fact ,there is a famous person (someone you would recognize,he's ...
My baby boy is a BIG BOY today! He is 1 years old and I think he knows it is a special day already as I just let him eat his cake batter ! It seems to of made his day already and it hasn't even been cooked or a candle to blow out yet! LOL....He will be a silly dog for sure as I know him all too well and can't IMAGINE the look on his face when we sing Happy Birthday to him later! It makes me SMILE just thinking on it! I will take pi...
Bill's vision has long been a strange thing to me in many ways as I see things that I can not explain. I see Bill's vision CHANGING each person in ways that can and will CHANGE THE WORLD for the BETTER. We often fall victim to things that long after are done STAY in our hearts..hurting our souls daily. With Transformation I have lifted HUGE weights off of my own self and my message is STRONGER for this. My message today ,yesterday and forever wil...
For a long time we wonder WHAT Baby Reggie actually knows other than he loves his mommy? He is the silliest dog I have ever owned ! He does not act like a Boxer but more like a baby and his name fits him well. He was named after a beautiful soul from Jamacia that Scott and I met on one of his many appt's at Spaulding Rehab in Boston for his disability issues. This man Reggie that we met had the colored beanie type Jamacian hat and the d...
Yesterday I headed out to work and Scott took my truck to go to his old work to say hello to everyone. I spoke with my client by phone a hour earlier and he said he was gonna call his daughter and make sure she left it unlocked etc..His home and Art Gallery are 30 minutes plus away...1 way. I saw Otis a Boxer of thiers I sold them 3 yrs ago outside and I told Scott he could go as she must be home since Otis was outside in the cold. It w...
Yesterday I had a WONDERFUL visit from my buddy Brian who stopped in for the afternoon. Oh do I wish he could of stayed for days ! Although the entire time I was thinking I SHOULD ask him for dinner but I had $20 bucks in my pocket and no gas in my truck and no food to feed him other than spaghetti ! I should hone up my "guest" skills a bit ! He is so SMART...I knew he was kind and nice but I never realized how bright he was. He can rem...
Many years ago I had a relative Phyliss Hill ,she was a automatic writer and she had a Indian Cheif as A Aguide. She wrote a book and was famous for her predictions and automatic writings in a way. She was quite taken by me when I was a child although I do not remember her ,or this, but it was told to me since my time here by my mother that I reconnected with and finally accepted in January of this year. She told me Phyliss thought I wa...
I did a blog on invisible children and how I was no longer one and it is gone...hmmm a coffee ride and a trip to the cemetary with my hubby to say "let's go Red Sox" and poof...vanished. Well I guess it wasn't that great of a blog anyways I as kinda skimmed over it due to wanting my tea....I thought about going on and on about things but it seemed more the thought that mattered more than the "history" of it all. Maybe it WAS t...
Last night in AMAZMENT I watched the BEST game of my life in many ways..I watched the Red Sox come back to WIn after being down 7-0 in the 7th inning to a awesome team ..it looked like we would never win..but the Red Sox did NOT listen to the boo's..or watch the score board or the deteriorating crowds. Instead they stayed FOCUSED and played thier game. In life we all have "voices" ..there are voices of reason and there are voices of dou...
Today was another great day with Beth my trainer as all days are. She is a great trainer and really kicks my butt but NEVER hurts my issues. I TRUST her completely ! Today she starts up the treadmill and I am jogging and jogging and she says..You just did 3 minutes..then 4,5,8, and she says Holy Good Crap ! You have just gone 1 mile Laura ,10 straight minutes ! Do you want to rest..I said NO..and did 2 more minutes! 12 minutes NON ...
I am not sure how many remember that I used a heart rock for a profile picture a while back. In the summer or late spring ,it was a bit ago...this is the link to the acual blog entry...there is no picture of the heart rock there ,I must not of added it,but it always has been in my photos here and for a long time I used it as my profile..so I easily pulled it up from there today and added it here..http://www.transformation.com/Laura/blog/Uncategor...
Funny...or weird..not sure yet I am always trying to UNDERSTAND things BEYOND a level that understanding is now...I was looking for a SONG to add today.."Our House" and was gonna leave it at that for the day as I am motivated beyond belief to workout and do well in my weight loss..then I saw the picture of this house..it looks ALMOST identical to my grandfather childhood home ,Jenkins Mansion I always called it but in the books on Whit...
My nieghbor 2 doors over did anyways ..which makes me understand why I was so worried more now....It is weird when you "know things" as it is not always known exactly what you know, more than a "feeling"..I was so frantic leading up to going and just could not almost bring myself to get on the plane..I dropped my son Josh off at high school in the am and cried and cried I was leaving him all the way home..I have only...
I can not begin to explain the LOVE I have found here on this Transformation.com...My life was firmly blessed with outstanding lifetime friends who walked every path of life with me ..true blue friends I want on MY ship whenever it takes on water. But over this past year and 3 months I have developed other trusted and joyous friendships and encounters that have "changed me".I will never do assignments exactly like others as my scho...
Yesterday I heard more "kind " stuff than humanly possible as well as had a mind blowing sign from the Universe which made me realize even more so my personal abilities to do what ever it is I do with the Universe ..Cause to date other than be easliy "able" to connect,to see and to listen is about all I know I do..what it ties to ,goes too or means I don't know. I want it to be World Peace but it seems for...
This am I go to work out with Beth at 7:30 instead of 6:30,thank gosh as I was up last night with the Red Sox who WON! But it is bitter sweet in a way and kept me up until almost 3 am as I get melincoly my grandfather watched them religiously for 99 yrs and the "blanks" hardly EVER won..LOL...Now they win ALOT! LOL..He is in a front row seat every game but still...ahh ! It is also hardwhen the show you the faces of those who lost as I t...
I asked my mother for help...UNBELIEVEABLE ! I thought my head was going to EXPLODE as she spoke to me about demensions of carry on laugage and amounts of deoderant or shampoo allowed on different airlines. Oh My gosh my head completely went into a tail spin HEADACHE! I can't compute these things and although I don't let hardly any education get me down as I can learn what I need or want I still can't compute things like that in my head ..An...
Here are my words or my message to everyone at T.com..as I NEED to get ready and I want to get really cleaned and organized around here as I NEVER go away for days on end...It is silly to wash walls and ceilings I know but this I can not help. Anything that ever needed to be done HAS to be done BEFORE I step foot on any plane ! I will be so organized when I come home it will be like a vacation all over again! lol ...
I have been here since Aug 07' ..I was brought here thru forces that still evade me in some ways but yet fully known in others. It has been a joyrney that every moment has brought me great emotion,realizations and many reflective monents and eye opening realizations. I can no longer bring you the "undeducated street kid from horrific tradgity and beyond"....I can only give you ME as I am now. I came here not to "find me" ...
You know the funny thing about me FINALLY letting my mother get to me yesterday was actually in a way a good thing..a growth thing...a hard thing yes and in a way I could feel my inner mechinisms working after this as then I was like SEE WHAT DID I TELL YOU DON'T ALLOW YOURSELF TO HAVEFEELINGS LIKE THAT...That INNER VOICE told me something I FORGOT....See many know me here as WHO I AM..not WHO I WAS...a few that have been here longer than I knew ...
I was wondering HOW for months now I was able to accept my mother for who she is as well as be around her or spend any time with her. It has been quite a MIRACLE that we have not just been together in the same room,but that I had her to dinner,had a yard sale here I had her come to and be a part of ,and then to talk to her about my grandfather without me flipping out and to have driven her to the airport and have her tell me to keep the 50 CENTS ...
I have been so elated with emotions ranging from shock,awe,pride,honor and worry since I discovered I was able to go to Tenn weekend. So much so my head has been spinning. It is the the way I am able to go and the intention and meaning behind it that has set my mind on fire and at ease. It is unbelieveable yet believeable at the same time. But my husband has SEEN what is going on in my head..he see's the stressors and stresses. So yesterday ...
I think the Universe is so funny..it seems to not only have a sense of humor and stuff but it also collectively works for you behind the scenes when you least expect it ! Today after another kick butt work out with Beth my trainer she hands me a pair of sneakers...Funny thing is .....I cried INSTANTLY...as I got a tingle thru out my entire body as well..BECAUSE of this reason.....I have met MANY people in my lifetime..some with tons of money ,som...
My friend...everyones friend..Dusy Luv turned me on to this Laminin a bit ago as I blogged about a while ago..It in itself was AMAZING..I enjoy the knowledge that we are all tied together with the same stuff and that this Laminin is ecensially a CROSS in it's genetic makeup. I always feel we are ALL the same..ALL EQUAL..and kinda like a glass of water that if you add coloring to it it canges color but it is still the same water and...
Yesterday and the days that lead up to it have been monumentous to me in many ways..There is a deep appreciation for "the moment" now as well as I am in it..LOL...I live now in this moment as never before. But I still will wearchild like glasses that tint my world to the PEACEFUL PLACE IT SHOULD AND WILL BE ! Many say they are transforming and I can't wait for them to be in the moment too..But truly..and for afact we can not t...
Emotions have taken over me the last 2 days because a dream has been realized...today my fortune cookie reads (for real) "With Our Thoughts We Make Our World"...... My thoughts today are many...I have come a long and windy path a uphill road and a down hill road as wellThe road has not always been known or true to it\'s designThe perseverence to trudge forth not knowing and not being afraid of that unknownThe a...
Every Tuesday and Thursday I work out with Beth my personal trainer ..it is a AWESOME workout and I combine it with the gym atmosphere I built in my living room...I have never worked out more in my lifetime than these past months. Today I so excitedly told her about the beautiful truth of why I am getting to attend Tenn weekend as it is a remarkable reason that I do not share only because it would sound concieded to some here but to tho...
I think I am in Fairy Tale land ! I am able to attend Tenn Champions Weekend in like 2 weeks... I am still in shock and very excited and nervous all at once. I never really travel..so it is a scary thing in itself...I never flew other than to Colorado when I was like 16 so that was a while ago ( I am almost 42, LOL ) I never really have left my house for any real length on time either..so this is all foriegn but EXCITING! It is only a few d...
I sit here and wonder IF me telling you I put on size 16's today matters..I know it is SUPPOSED to...I know in my small world it does...But it really isn't the thing that drives my mind. I can't change what makes me up and how I interpet the world. I just am this way. I watched a movie last night "Return Of The Titans" I think was the name..I could almost not watch it as it was a story ..a true story...based around PREDJUDICE..I gr...
Yesterday was awhirlwind of events. I have several things all going on at once. My head IF it wasn't attached might of blown off these past days. I have learned much patience and strength to "deal" with things as they come my way since I have been here this past year. I "feel" great..but also with Foster Children planning and my son's brain injury and all the meals and exercise and life in general with a disabled hus...
I have been so blessed by so many things in this lifetime. I still am in awe that so many BEAUTIFUL people say such beautiful things about me...I "feel" more deserving of those words these days but I will never forget my grandfather who was my only strength for so many years. It is a gift to see signs for what they arte and heck once in a while you might be off and they might be a coincidence BUT what if they weren't always as they coul...
After reflecting on my old blogs and all the insane,wonderful,crazy and unbeliveable events that have happened over this year plus here ,I am in awe....I see how much I have grown..how far I have come and how much I have accomplished ! A BEAUTIFUL friend of mine whom I also consider a soul sister ..set me a BEAUTIFUL song today with words she typed out and added for me to read..she said they had a really great message for...
I shared part of my journey back here to the best of my recollection but this morning after my workout with Beth I wanted to check out my old blogs on Tribbit. i haven't looked at them much since this new board was formed. I copied and pasted the actual events ..they make more sense than my ramblings of yesterday..lol..and pictures exist of the mug..(I actually HAVe the mug but too lazy to retake photo,LOL)You ned to look at t...
haven't talked as much lately about the many wonders in my life..I don't know why as they are still around all the time. But some things are just insane..the other night driving home from a day trip to the Berkshires with my hubby I saw the most unbeliveable thing. I saw a shadow of a man jogging across the street in front of us but REALLY CLOSE to the car coming towards us. I said WOW that person is brave running in front of that car so cl...
My grandfather taught me much. I might not of had many teachers in life with a degree in teaching but I sure did have some of the best out there! I enjoy everyday to it's fullest and even though I might not have much to say today it is because I am tieing up the loose ends on many things. Foster care people want to come out to finish up in Oct and turn us on. I want everything perfect before a child comes (they already instected ou...
Today I had adecent workout considering. I have a migrane and cramps..yes friends I am not pregnant it seems. This is a good thing more than a bad thing because of many reasons. I had actually gave a little prayer that someone not able to concieve would and me not be as a gift to them..I have 2 AWESOME,BEAUTIFUL children that I ADORE! I am at a crossroads with Ryan also ,seeing he is almost 18 and he has this brain injury ,very serious and life c...
Over the weekend I saw a piece of exercise equipment on a lawn for sale on my street. I asked myson to go up and ask if they'd take 20 for it instead of 30 as it was labeled. He was not thrilled with me ..LOL...But the older woman who answered the door said "That would be fine" ..then she sent her husband out to help load it on the truck and he said..you don't have much to go on your weight loss you look great..I almost DIED! ...
Today is INTERNATIONAL PEACE DAY and just for 1 day we can ALL get along..no fights..no wars...no bloodshed..no bombs or killing....I wonder WHY just 1 day we settle for? Why do we believe we can only achieve 1 day? Why did it take aprox 3 long hard years to declare just 1 day? as humans I would THINK we would KNOW we were WORTH MORE THAN THAT? Hmmmmmmm not sure who makes these rules but I think it is time to break them and go HOG WILD and take 2...
I added the video because it is easier to understand the blog after you watch it..LOL...Words are so important as Bill's recent assignment and many assignments reflect but also I think the MAJOR part of Bill's vision (without knowing his vision,lol) is how we FEEL...Words we speak to oursrlves often reflect how we feel but what others say to us really hold no meaning to us UNLESS WE FEEL THEM OURSELVES. I never in my life cared much if others sai...
Yesterday Jaki said there was a simple way about my words. One she couldn't desrcibe but that they were not all battered down with junk in some way that others have been "taught". I had to laugh as I always feel my lack of teaching has had great negitive impact on me. LOL...I have fought to gain the knowledge I have and this is a easy thing as I think mother nature tells us what we need to surive . We all have simple truths of our ...
Transformation is hard but yet it is easy. Easy if we can really be "honest" with ourselves and push ourselves to our peak potential. Sometimes are are all afraid of that goal as we have been taught it is unabtainable. But I swear it is not. It is with in EVERYONES REACH..if THEY desire. I for 1 think we need to get the books out to the Media and ALL persons that hold any seat in office. I have been listening to things on TV that ...
Today was a gift. Everyday is a gift . I was able to communicate love to friends and family and to enjoy the day...the moments. My husband and I went for a ride..we headed out to nowhere..no destination. We stopped at the health food store and got some frozen Shataki mushrooms and Asparagus. We drank protein shakes and drove some more. We had no care the grocieries might defrost. There was no worries or cares today. We ended up driving to a ...
Not much in my circumsatnces has changed..My son still needs his brain to heal, I still am wondering IF I am pregnant and my life is pretty much the same..But you know what ..it is OK....Whatever will be will be and I am strong enough to handle any of it. I am smart enough to handle any of it and I am prepared enough to handle it. So pretty much it is all up to God and "the plan" . The other day at my height of worry I knew there was no...
Yesterday was a ick day..happy it was yesterday! I know alot of my stress triggers and 1 is definately my children...I hope it is for all of us ..in a GOOD WAY of course..Today I awoke reading some pretty beautiful emails and posts from FRIENDS..friends even I didn't "know" I had...LOL..Thats ALWAYS COOL! But it was the LOVE they sent in thier words that touched me the SHARING even of some personal history of thiers..that made my heart ...
I loved this ...because...I CAN RELATE...lol...relating is the first part in understanding! LOL...Hugs and HAPPY MONDAY ! Hugs,Laura & Baby Reggie ...
Today I have so much house cleaning to do,but I will do it HAPPILY due to the thoughts,images and prayers that tie us all to Texas and Louisiana right now. Often in life we want things to go smoothly because we are so busy with the same old same old. Although each day and task seems so dawnting and massive if a pin drops out of place..We really never " catch up " as there is always something else to "catch"...I get like t...
Were the Anunnaki the Nephilim in the Bible?...
Earlier I was thing of many things. I agree with Miss Bliss that it is like 2 people..that is a GOOD thing..trust me..LOL...But also I CAN connect the dots and it is only with fat, my hubby and my children's love & love for them...you'd have to know what I speak of to understand that sentence..LOL...But what I do know is this.... and this is ALL I guess I NEEDED to KNOW...if I am speaking in weird language I apoligize as it all...
I never really "knew" how much crap was in my head...It is overflowing out it seems..But it can't escape in the day as I am too focused on my NEW attitiude so it escapes at night in my dreams..well IF you want to call them dreams..I woke up at 5 am and could not bear to go back to bed. I MUST have abandoment issues as Dusty talks about, as all last night I was dreaming my hubby was leaving me for NO REASON...he just kept saying he ...
My vision board was always hard for me as I was always afraid to share my dreams with everyone...my deerest freinds were ok as they would never laugh at me but others might think it is too crazy a idea or that I was concieded or whacked in my dreams....I am here to say I am neither..all I am is WORTHY of these dreams as you are worthy of YOURS..Mine are to CHANGE this world ...change it by EXAMPLE & MY STORY...My story is not the ONLY st...
I have never been more "aware" of my barriers as I have been these weeks...then to turn that corner & to hire Beth and to be accountable that was the ticket..but I still have these dreams...it seems the closer I get the more they come...if most people had them they might never go to sleep again..they are not nightmares per say but they are wacked! Last night people were trying to kill me and everyone was commenting on me loosi...
I have long stood for PEACE...at times it is harder to be peaceful but I TRY..if I fall I get up...if I stray I change direction..I RELATE to this man in many ways although different things ..we are the same..proactive in OUR JOURNEY...We NEED TO BE ..no one will do it FOR YOU...YOU MUST TAKE THE LEAD ON YOUR JOURNEY WHATEVER THE JOURNY IS...I HOPE ...and PRAY this message will touch your heart as it did mine..I wrote the radio show & they co...
For breakfeast today I had my Right Light Shake at 6 am and at 9 am I went to breakfest with hubby & believe it or not I ordered this....Harvest Quishe with summer squash,zucchinni,tomatoes,garlic and sides were 2%cottage cheese and blueberries & pineapple ...And a glass of ice water...I feel like I had a breakfest of CHAMPIONS! I did not eat every bit as I would feel like I needed to when paying $10 BUC...
I have struggled more than I have ever allowed anyone to know.Even though I always try to explain deep feelings and make it "light" as possible I have been struggling since 1999 to loose anything pst 20 pounds as I get feeling "sexy" & I loose it..I have different feelings than most as MY "before" weight was VERY negitive & at times I loose freinds by even being HONEST & saying I was ever a .....shhhhhh (...
Here I go ! On my way to the trainers to JOG again! YIPPPEEEEE ! This is my new theme song and I am off to go HIT IT HARD! We are gonna do BOXING to today which I might add I am GREAT AT! LOL...Have a AWESOME DAY! I just wanted to say GOODMORNING TRANSFORMERS as it has been a long time since I said EXACTLY THAT! LOL...Hugs,Love & Light ,Laura & Baby Reggie xoxoxoxox...
Finally I got it together enough to SHARE with you...I can't believe how much taking a day trip takes out of you ...well a day trip of Star Jumps I guess would! LOL....Our day started off great..although about 30 minutes into it my hubby says while I am drriving 65 mph on the highway..."Gee I wonder if the lugnuts were tightened on the front wheels after the ball joints were done?" "Yeah they would of seen it when inspected..&...
I have long enjoyed the Dummies series of books and now I just happened upon this video...it was GREAT! Very relaxing..I have a HARD time sometimes meditating & focusing. I can't always unclutter my mind of the day's needs. This was really nice...I hope it helped you as well....I am going to add a blog later on my trip to see Diane....I appreciate everyone who has wrote asking about it..I just haven't had a chance yet to really gather all my ...
Remember I was supposed to start with a personal trainer Beth who bought 2 puppies from these past liters...on Tuesday..well I had no choice but to reschedual as I had no sticker for my truck that am until after our schedualled appt at 6:30 am..so where I was driving to see Diane the next day we decided Friday am at 6:30 would be way better to start...so HERE I GO....I am on my way for my 1st visit to my trainers home..this is a NEW trainer from ...
Well NOW that I am awake a bit..I want to say I LOVED going to surprise Diane..although it wasn't the surprise I had hoped it was a surprise..Her phone was out and I kept calling & getting the machine so ended up in front of her house and still got machine so you can imagine my panic. Her daughter had told her earlier we were coming because she was headed to church etc...So she was surprised but not the way I had hoped...although we had...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ,HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU....HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR DIANE ...HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! ....Diane I had to do some things early today so I already added a birthday thread ..here is the link to it so you need not look to find it..LOL..... HAPPY BIRTHDAY,Love ,Laura,Scott,Ryan & Josh and Baby Reggie xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxo http://www.transformation.com/forum/transformation-central/2148-happy-birthday-diane.html#po...
Freinds is something I have always been blessed to have. I do not know when I started to accumlate them but I did and today I was driving to get my morning tea and hubbies coffee and I decided to turn down the radio which was Areosmith 's song "Dude looks like a lady" and thank God...seemed a funny and odd time to do this as that is about as far away a song from God as you can get..but it seemed important. I started by tHanking God for ...
Yesterday was a good day...(I put pictures up under my pictures) ...it was a great day actually,except when I got sea sick. That NEVER has happened and later as I think more on it ,it was a migrane or something. But in any case we only had a few hour trip..LOL....My hubby and kids were great about it and it actually was sweet that they were holding me and rubbing my back and Ryan sat on my lap on the ride back..It is nice to know they a...
Yesterday was not the 1st time I shared those experiences or the 1st time I thought about them..but it is the first time I made a connection with the past in that reguard..and how it was stopping the progress of my future. To some degree I realized it but somehow it really became apparent to me these few days. I have heard from a few awesome people that it took "bravery" ...to me it did not ...it is just truth. Truth is easy for me...
For many reasons I must take these videos and move forward from my earlier blog. I am not sorry I shared those words but I do not "live" in that place. There is no reason to ..that is the past and I need to live in the present & for the furture. I felt the pains needed to release it to the Universe I can assure you. But this is my journey and I need to focus on the path I want to go not the paths I have taken. I had no guide, no lig...
I have been in my mind anyway's... in turmoil these days ,weeks,months ,years..I imagine. I knew I wrote the words on my pictures before that said "Protection" was the reason for my "keeping" weight . I know I have openly touched on MANY things that make people cringe at times,cry at others and laugh at others. I am a person of very open opinion and much strength..But as I type these words I cry..I cry not because I am we...
I have had a hard time lately being accountable for many reasons. I have had a 20 pound weight loss and if anyone knows me weight isn't my biggest goal. But yet it is a goal. The other goals I have achieved and I am quite content. But that "contentment " keeps me from the hunger of any more. Also the uneasiness of my hubby seeing me loose weight also keeps me at a level..My hubby has a very hard time accepting the thoughts of me as...
Today I have to get my mother from the airport ...If any of you remember the 50 cent thing you will laugh about that...LOL.....Yesterday I bought all the odds and ends we needed for the boat this year. Kinda LATE in the year to get it all ready to set out on a voyage but hey better late than never! LOL....My hubby is very happy...so that make me very happy! I bought 2 huge batteries..way bigger than our old ones. I never liked being out on t...
When you know not what you are speaking about......this might be how it sounds...lol...this is why I try to speak only what I know. LOL ...
Dearest Dusty....You graciously offered me a tib bit the other day as well as BEAUTIFUL HEARTFELT words from your heart on how I have changed your life for the better in some ways. This does not go unnoticed as it took me days to be able to THANK YOU as those words meant the world to me. You are a GREAT man of CHRACHTER and I am PROUD to be your freind and to of had ANY impact on your life..well brings me JOY and to TEARS instantly...I APPLA...
Today was the 1st day of Joshuas 9th grade experience! My baby has entered High School..(above is a picture of the school)....I have mixed feelings on that as a mommy, but I decided yesterday that these days that I have left on this contest that I am dedicating to each person that has affected my life in my lifetime in some great way. There is no need for them to be in order as they are all equal in love. I will then today dedicate this day ...
I just can't get my head around much lately...if I think on things to long my head my burst & who wants THAT ! ? Not I....I have been having MUCH success with this program but yet I can not for the life of me stick with the idea of a contest. I want everyone to win as in Bill's video Body Of Work..it is why I feel in love with Bill's team & remain a stead fast believer in his wisdom. ALL people matter. To me lot's of things...
Well you might think I am joking but I am NOT..LOL..This was a hectic day & I would of loved to of added this earlier but I was straight out from 6 am today...But last night I had a family come to my home to look at our puppies. They had seen their neighbors puppy and were thrilled we had saved the runt puppy ...they loved him right away. They said they always wanted one of my puppies and when they come we don't have any left & they ...
Yesterday I decided that I would go clothes shopping since I had a important party to attend later in the day. I worked all am Saturday away from my house ,which I HATE doing so I felt I deserved a treat! I took my hubby to lunch & then sprung it on him. He was not in protest so that was a good thing! We went to Burlington Coat Factory which has bargins galore. I can't stand to spend money on my self and it cringes me to do so...But I wa...
Jaki, in the past few blogs yesterday you know you posed the question to me even though inadvertently... that made me wonder WHY we can't break away from the NORM'S or the GROUP...I 1st want to give HUGE kudos to this board who I personally EXPECTED these blogs to be GONE due to the content..it is strong and I know that & respect this is not my board. I promised myself I would not be upset if they were but respectful..But I also know I would ...
I just responded to Jaki who is one of my dearest freinds and I decided HER response was going to by typical as Nancy my other ROCKING GIRLFREINDS was similar...So I added my response to her in this blog and for anyone who decides they want to watch the last blogs video well that is great..but for those who just can't bar the thought of it as who would right? Well I added this video for you..it is a easier video & one I loved as a kid. I am n...
I am going to take a few days off..I am NOT mad or upset or falling off track..I need to give my head a rst as I JUST had to go somewhere in my head I do not wish to go..WAR....Dusty..WHOM I LOVE BY THE WAY & RESPECT GRATELY..did a thread on Heros of War ...those who PROTECT our frredoms..this is TRUE...VERY true! But we also sugar coat war in too many ways..we show you the PRETTY side of war..a beautiful picture he added and it was beautiful...
This is almost funny....I went again to the coffee shop as I do everyday but these days I just don't get MY 32 oz coffee/slash dessert thing..But I get my hubbies & a green tea instead now. I suppose that is in a way a GREAT achievement because it is like a alcoholic going to the package store. I WAS addicted to my 32 oz twice a day coffee thing for MANY years...8 yrs I think? So I have conqured that addiction it seems. I never had any ...
Well maybe not..but did it get you here? LOL...These are some of my FAVORITE quotes ! Today was a nice day already since I went to the coffee shop..not for me but the hubby...lol...and they said..Laura have you lost weight? I said yes..20 and they said you look it in the face,you look young..I said just wait until I loose the other 80..I might go back to stripping..lol...they laughed and Vanna the owner who is my dear freind..said WHY NOT! LOL......
Love,Compassion & Kindness go much further & you don't need a genius IQ for them in fact many with a high education do not understand these simple words. They are so easy that they escape them as they look to much more complicated things and reasoning. Life is EASY..BE KIND..BE CONSIDERATE ...BE COMPASSIONATE....Easy huh? LOL...
I was so excited about my last nights appointment at the vet with our 19 puppies that I couldn't sleep past 3:30 am today! See this 1 year time frame has been a barrage of EVERYTHING! Everything under the sun & more! When I came here last August,I had everything..so I thought. I had a state of mind of my past 17 years of life & I had hardened to the point that I had no "real" emotions left. I was kind ,sure I was..compassio...
My son Ryan cracks me UP..yesterday he tells me that he HATES SOAP! the bar kind tat is..he is not wanting any part of it..he hates the shape the feel & it doesn't work well he says..I told him people have been using bar soap for centuries. He don't care it is not working for him. I asked him if anyone said he smelled after using this horrible soap..he said no but it did not matter ! Today I called him on his cell phone..the 2nd one I bought ...
To the beauttiful Angels here on Earth...This is a shout out to all of them but especially the 2 Angels Diane & Niahm who remembered that yesterday was the aniversary of my grandfathers passing & sent me love & thoughts during this time....Today is my Nikko's aniversary & I find it only fitting that I add this for them & all the ANGELS that have helped me thru this year....Ronleigh B Jenkins April 5th 1902-August 17th 2001 &am...
I have no real ideas & words today that I want to share as I normally do..one because I am at PEACE...which considering my life today is NO DIFFERENT than at other times where I might of had a different feeling other than PEACE ...I had earlier to "explain" something yet again & I used to get OVERWHELMED with the feelings that came with that process..But now it is EASIER for me to explain & to seper...
I found this today but only today would I understand it's true meaning. I feel I found this for several reasons but always my reason is to SHARE..I found it easier to read if I stopped it & read it as even though it repeats ,it is hard to read so quickly..the music it is set to I think is Greensleves and how exactly do I know that..do not ask as I do not at times know what I know..I just follow....The song is soothing & holds great m...
The fact of me liking Bill comes from this 1 thing...I watched his video Body Of Work in 99' ..I saw that EVERYONE was a CHAMPION ..I saw this in my heart & then I saw this on the video. It made me CRY..as I do anytime I see goodness or souls connecting for the better of mankind & not the better of 1. I applaud the efforts,dedication & hard work of Bill and his team. Although I will never be a groupie I BELIEVE IN THE MESSAGE. I ...
Today my BABY Joshua ,goes to HIGH SCHOOL for the 1st time to see his new school & to pick classes etc etc. It is a new school in our town ,one that is supposidly the best in the state that others want badly to go to..LOL..it costs a TON of money & is a bit over the top. My hubby & I have never been in the inside of it & are going too for the 1st time. It should be a TRIP for sure. As our $4,000 plus property taxes pay f...
I had a thought yesterday while riding back from dinner with my hubby. We were riding the Harley & I think something about holding him tightly and the wind in your face and the ability to SEE things up close gives you a different prospective. I had this thought..it said to me..God can speak for himself. But it was a statement I was supposed to figure out the HOW to get it to the people. I thought gee wiz how do I get THAT message across ...
I wanted to make this story available ..it goes along with things I have always said here as well as my blog about conformity the other day. So funny God would add this to my life this am..I am now sending it with love to you and for all to see what we are allowing ourslves to become. As many know..I will NEVER conform..I say SHAME...But with that I also say..Please God forgive them & help them see as it is only then things will change, Hugs,...
When my road started it was dark..it was scary & it felt like a eternity to get down. I started off a child like everyone else. But then events turned to situations and rebelion and ultimately SURVIVAL. It is survival of the fittest in a way but NOT the fit you see here ,but the fittness of how able you CAN PROTECT YOURSELF. It is simply..live or DIE..a choice that is not always yours when you live on the streets. I was never in a gang but I ...
I am always in amazement when I am given "lessons" from God. See with very little "real" schooling,I find the teachings of God to be like a tutor in life! The most importanthing I can do is LISTEN...then the 2nd is SHARE...then 3rdly GROW. This is HOW I got myself from street kid to great wife & mother and PERSON. It was not a magic pill but a series of LIFE LESSONS FROM GOD...Interpeted thru my grandfather for most of my ...
When you think of things in life what do you think of? I think of everyone being HAPPY...CONTENT...I felt for awhile now that poor Herman the saved Albino Rat that ended up in our pond April 2nd, then made his way into our strawberry patch & ultimately havaheart cage & dining room just was not HAPPY. He must of been LONELY..The book says the are social animals and NEED to have COMPANIONS(this MIGHT be a KEY word here) LOL..When Rats are l...
My life has been so insane that there is no way I can relive it here in this blog..But most have heard it thru the pages of my blogs. All I will say is today ..no let's go back to yesterday..Yesterday I told a dear friend to look for signs and I never say this but I did yesterday..I said LOOK TO CLOUD FORMATIONS..Later I looked up and saw the most BEAUTIFUL sight I ever saw..a huge rain cloud ,grey & dark and it had a most unbelieveable silve...
http://news.aol.com/article/teachers-cure-clears-way-for-new-saint/126460I belueve in many things that some might say is crazy..at times maybe they are right but I enjoy when I can prove my point. MIRACLES CAN & DO HAPPEN...we just aren't always privy to it. IF you believe in your heart I believe ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN ! : )...
Words of wisdom from a 9 year old was left on my blog yesterday by a dear and gracious freind. Her daughter had told her long ago "God Knows The Truth and that is all that matters" ...These words are so TRUE and so PURE and so AWESOME as they are the KEY to helping me unlock this door. I have been STUCK & trying to ram it open..maybe because I am a Aries? LOL...I decided yesterday that it was NOT a inner fight I had but a truth stru...
Not bad ...not bad at all.....Thanks God ...
This is the last part of my blogs today that are here for MY growth and if they touch you ..AWESOME..But I also PRAY no one can really realate as I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy (which I have none anymore as I release those feelings to God since this group) But it is a matter of speaking kinda...I was drawn earlier to a woman..a woman that I instantly felta connection,although I will probably never meet or know...but a co...
Today I have had a inner struggle..One that although others understood it still is a ongoing inner battle for me. My road in life has been a very long one and up hill and tortured at times. I do not get into it as I don't like to remeber those times. I try to be positive at all costs but sometimes these costs are to myself. I need to address some fears that God keeps putting in my way on purpose..he has decided to make me HAVE to addres...
Your words today of understanding & compassion as you ALWAYS have SHARED with myself & so many countless but countable people here & in your everyday life TOUCHED ME GREATLY! I never know what plain I should be on as it seems only lessons learned down a path..but the path is always brighter in the end and always has added something great in its journey..there are no greater gifts shared than the ones here..I adore this place with...
TODAY I WAS THINKING ABOUT MANY THINGS..MORE THAN DAYS BEFORE. I WENT TO MY GRANDFATHERS GRAVE JUST TO SAY THANK YOU AS I DID NOT NEED ANY FAVORS TODAY..ANY HELP FROM ABOVE...I KIND OF HAVE IT IN MY SOUL TODAY..MYSELF. I LAUGH WHEN I SEE THE PICTURES ABOVE AND IT IS A FUNNY THING...IT GIVES ME A SENSE OF WHO I AM FINALLY ,TODAY...SEE IN THE 1ST PICTURE THERE IS A TREE IN THE MIDDLE..A MAGNOLIA TREE..WHEN IT BLOOMS IT IS STUNNING BUT IT...
These are a few words written by Emerson...he lived long ago and yet his words still whisper thru the voices of the enlightened daily....I added these today as my path has been long and at times I have been waery and at others I have had limitless energy,but ALWAYS I followed these words ,these ideas ,although I never read them until today..They helped "seal" in my heart the knowledge of LIFE that God instills in each of us at bir...
They say this is the green bloob ..they are baffled by it & it contains no stars..they call it at Yale a "Cosmic ghost" ..I hope it is friendly as it looks full of energy.. ; ) Hugs ,Laura Here is the real story on it..."At first, we had no idea what it was. It could have been in our solar system, or at the edge of the universe," Yale University astrophysicist Kevin Schawinski, a member and co-founder of the Galaxy Z...
I am running today and I wanted again to share with you something that touches my heart everytime I see it..in life there are up's & down's and all arounds..but NEVER FORGET YOUR VOICE..YOUR POTENTIAL..or that YOU MATTER!!! Hugs and much love,Laura & Baby Reggie ...
The other day when asked if I do my blog for responses I should of answered " I don't leave them up long enough for responses, as I seem to be addicted to thoughts and dreams lately"..this is a FINE DAY..a HAPPY DAY & my ramblings in my head I have tried to capture on paper but they come too fast & frequent. Some where these...When we are in doubt we must always look about as it is not always what we see and feel that ...