Hello Everyone. My name is Thia and I am a recovering addict.

I have chosen to start this thread for any person who is an addict. It does not matter what you are addicted to. There is a common ground with people are are addicted. I am wanting towork the steps in order to overcome addictions in my life that are interfering with my progress to health and wellness.

I will work these steps along side Bill's Transformation program. Anyone can join me in this thread and the threads I start as we progress through the 12 steps program.

Alcoholism
Drug Addiction
Food
Gambling
Spending
Or any other addiction that you may have.

I will not be following any particular book or format, but just speaking my truth in regards to each step. Doing the steps comes naturally to me having done them for over 20 years now. If you choose to follow a specific format by all means please do.

I have searched in this group for threads pertaining to working the steps and did not find any. So decided to start this. Please join me if you so wish. I believe Step work is an ongoing discussion in our lives. Do whatever you feel comfortable since this is a public forum, I myself, will be an open book, that is just me. I have been this way all over this site, so there is no reason to stop now .

Anyone like to join me in working the 12 steps? Please do.

Step One:

We admitted we were powerless over our Addiction -----that our lives had become unmanageable.

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Hello, my name is Thia, and I am a recovering addict.

I am a recovering addict at heart. I have an addictive nature. At this point in time I am focusing on the addictive substances that are stopping me from leading a healthy life and moving forward. In addition to being an alcoholic and drug addcit (sober and clean for 18+ months again) I am aware that I have food addiction.

I am in denial and have been in denial over my food addiction for years. I come in and out of denial. I will admit it then I will take it back. Certain substances like caffeine, sugar, flour, refined products, cause serious addictive behaviors in me. I believe these addictions have stopped me from reaching my ultimate fitness and health goals while working Bill's Transformation Program. I have made great progress, but believe I can do better. I believe once I admit these addictions and work the steps I will move further along in my Transformation.

Plain and simple I cannot consume alcohol, caffeine, refined sugar, or flour in any way, shape or form, it causes a chemical reaction in my body, cravings and the inability to stop consuming them. Therefore I MUST abstain from these products in order to reach my health goals.

Either I admit this and move forward by abstaining, or I continue on with denial and continue to struggle with it. My choice.

This has become unmanageable for me. I have no control over consuming these food substances once I put them into my body. Although I have done well over the past year and made great progress using Free Day, I have to *white knuckle* it all week and most of the time I do not make it. It is like an addictive urge that consumes me and it is beyond mere *willpower.* Why would I want to live like that! This is no way to live. Constantly battling with it.

When there is a better way. Abstinence. I know this one. I have abstained from alcohol and drugs most of my adult life. 18 out of 22 years. I know addiction. Having been 11 years sober and clean 2 years ago and relapsing. I know that once I put a substance that I am addicted to into my body, there is no controlling it, it is beyond control.

Therefore I am admitting here that I am addicted to refined products such as caffiene, sugar and flour and must abstain from them from this moment on in order to gain some peace and serenity. I have actually been avoiding this Addiction-Recovery area because I did not want to face the truth. But I am here now.

Food addiction is a serious matter and can cause disease and death. I no longer wish to live with this.

I am wanting to come out of denial just like with my alcohol and drug addiction

Thanks for listening.

Thanks for sharing Thia. Your openness will help you and many others, even if people don't comment and say so....

I can definitely relate to all of those things since I have SUCH an addictive nature...alcohol, drugs, food, refined sugar, white flour...I do abstain from all of those too....

Sometimes I wonder if I should stop caffeine bc I got hooked on fat burners for a while (and they didn't really burn fat bc they kept me up at night which causes fat storage really! lol)...i just liked the feeling...

Anyways, thanks again for sharing and showing people the steps. They are so powerful and healing, it's amazing how they work....

Love you!

Steph

Love you too Steph.

Yes, It is here for anyone if they so choose to join me and work the steps, Im going to go through them!

And like you said, it will help someone who may be reading, it has only taken me a year to make it here

I felt that I needed to respond to your comments about being of an addictive nature. I too, battle an addiction to sweets. I crave them every day and cannot seem to pass them up when I am around them. I grew up with an alcoholic father and swore I would never put my children through that. But, still, I feel like I have my own addiction with the chocolate and pop.
I am impressed with how you eat no refined sugars or white flour. I would like to keep in touch with you as I work through this transformation. Thanks for opening up this thread.
Laura

Laura. That is great that you relate. The one thing I know with any kind of chemical/physical addiction for me is that abtinence from the substance is the only true solution to the issue. That is if you are a true addict and it not simply a bad habit.

One thing Bill teaches (as well as the recovery movement) is a way to find out is to attempt to stop the substance on your own and if you cant than you know it is an addiction and I know from past behavior that sugar and refined flour are addictive in nature for me so I am choosing to work the 12 steps and abstain from putting any sugar and flour into my body.

Step One:

We admitted we were powerless over our Addiction -----that our lives had become unmanageable.

I've recently come to realise that I've been struggling with my addiction, on and off, for my whole adult life.
I've wrestled with it - most times winning, sometimes losing.
I've wrestled with "Why" - identifying addictive personalities in my family - alcoholic grandparents, a mother that's addicted to drugs.

I sought help, through a step program, last year but had some trust issues - there were few in the group I could relate to and I didn't connect with a sponsor / mentor.

What I need to do is start at the beginning again with Step One.

It seems to me that there are 2 very distinct kinds of addiction - ones where you completely abstain from something; e.g. alcohol, drugs ... and others where it's impossible to abstain completely from something, where you have to set manageable boundaries; e.g. in the case of food - yes, you can cut out certain types of food such as sugar or whatever but you still need to eat. I know this is the dilemma many people with eating disorders face.

Certain step programs, dealing with this latter type of addiction, have developed something called "The Three Circles" (as, in the case of food addictions, it isn't food in and of itself that causes us problems, but the addiction to certain types of food or behaviors) which they feel is necessary to better define abstinence in these cases.





How "The Three Circles" work ...

Draw three concentric circles, consisting of an inner, middle, and outer circle.
With the help of our sponsor or others in recovery, we write down various things (e.g. types of food) or behaviors in each of the three circles.

In the inner circle we put the things or behaviors we want to abstain from; the ones we consider “acting out.” These are the behaviors that we identify, with our sponsor's guidance, as addictive, harmful, or unacceptable for us.

In the middle circle we put behaviors that may lead to acting out, or that we are not sure about.

In the outer circle we put healthy behaviors that enhance our life and our recovery



My addiction falls into this latter group ... but isn't food (at least, not my primary one!).

It is one that fills me with shame and fear of other's judgement and condemnation - yet here I am, reaching out to a group of strangers, hopng for acceptance and loving support because I don't want to fight this thing alone anymore.

Will my leap of faith in Transformation.com be justified?

Hi Achilles, thank you for sharing and taking a step to reaching out. I enjoyed your post and the 3 circles is interesting concept that I have not heard of.

For me personally, food is definitely not the problem, it are specific substances and so I consider myself an addict in regards to those specific substances, namely, sugar and flour (refined products). So abstinence is the direction I will go in.

Admitting we have a problem and becoming aware of how it makes our lives unmanageable is the first step toward dealing with it. Congrats to acknowledging that you are wanting to move forward and deal with your addiction.

I hope you will come back and share more. Im not sure what your addiction is and you only need share what you are comfortable with. Will you be using the 3 circles to deal with your addiction or going with abstinence of certain substances?

I am gathering from your post that your addiction may be a behavioral issue and not a chemical addiction.

There is also an addiction recovery chat on Tuesdays that you may be interested in attending that Bobby puts on....there is a thread about it, 4:30 pacific time. I plan on attending this Tuesday, hopefully we will see you there.

Hi my name is ShellyD, I am in a 12 Step Program for Compulsive overeaters and I'm painfully aware of the addictive nature of sugar, flour, wheat, caffeine and artificial sweeteners. Many in my 12 Step group have made the decision to eliminate some or all of those things as I have done. And doing this has brought me among other things sanity, clarity and weight loss! To show you how badly addicted I was- in 2008 I carried 250 EXTRA lbs ( yes you read that right) . By living the Steps and following the program of recovery, so far I have released nearly 160 of those excess lbs and more will follow in my Higher Power's time. Glad to know that you all are here, I like to tap into recovery resources of all kinds

Shelly congratulations on your success and finding peace with your addiction. That is great. Thanks for sharing on step on with us. It will help many people to see that there is an answer to addictions.

Hello.
I am new to Transformation. I love love love this thread! I am working the steps...but I am very new. I have finally (Truely) admitted to myself that I am a food addict. I am trying to learn my triggers right now....I know for sure that one of them is Peanut Butter....

I have found that praying alot and let go and let god...has really helped me in my moments of weakness. I have had 4 days of complete abstenance!!! I think the scheduled meal planning helps alot!!

Tracey.

Thank you for the welcome Thia

I totally agree - abstinence IS the way to go with most types of addiction

The 3 circles approach is more to do with behavioural issues, as you so correctly gathered - which is my particular challenge

And thank you again for starting this thread

A.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissC Hi Achilles, thank you for sharing and taking a step to reaching out. I enjoyed your post and the 3 circles is interesting concept that I have not heard of. For me personally, food is definitely not the problem, it are specific substances and so I consider myself an addict in regards to those specific substances, namely, sugar and flour (refined products). So abstinence is the direction I will go in. Admitting we have a problem and becoming aware of how it makes our lives unmanageable is the first step toward dealing with it. Congrats to acknowledging that you are wanting to move forward and deal with your addiction. I hope you will come back and share more. Im not sure what your addiction is and you only need share what you are comfortable with. Will you be using the 3 circles to deal with your addiction or going with abstinence of certain substances? I am gathering from your post that your addiction may be a behavioral issue and not a chemical addiction. There is also an addiction recovery chat on Tuesdays that you may be interested in attending that Bobby puts on....there is a thread about it, 4:30 pacific time. I plan on attending this Tuesday, hopefully we will see you there.

Thia thank you for starting this group/thread.

Last week I was on here searching the threads for this exact subject. Came across BobbyG and the Tuesday chat which I had committed to attending and then the next thing I knew its was early evening....Next week for sure...already marked on my daytimer.

It was very hard for me to admit that I was/am an addict. Once I started doing some inner work I was so shocked. I have been an addict all my life just bouncing from one substance to another. My current addiction was/is food bingeing.

Here is what scares me. When I give up one addiction another rears its ugly head. I am so hoping that this time I will not fall prey to past behaviours and will be able to condition myself to avoid triggers of addiction.

I have to dash off to work right now. I will be on later and properly introduce myself and get my thoughts put to paper.

Hugs
Zina

Hi,
I'm Dodi and I'm a caffiene addict. I'm very new to forums and also very new to the 12 steps. So my question is; how do you know when it's time to move on to the next step? What is step two?

Thanks for sharing!!!

Drug Rehab

Tracey, that is great, that is wonderful to really admit and acknowledge that there is an addiction happening, this is the first step to recovery from the addiciton...Awesome that you know this for yourself.

HI Zina, great, look forward to hearing more of your story. I think working the steps, and Bills Transformation Program and gaining spiritual maturity and transforming from the inside out will help us with these addictive behaviors in my life (I totally relate to what you are saying)


Dodi (mama-marathoner) it is time to move on to the next step when you feel in your heart you have admitted the truth of your addiction and the unmanageability this causes in your life, you are the only one who can say that for sure.

I will be doing the step 2 soon so you can see what it is.

Hi Everyone

The first step is admitting that I am powerless over food - that my life has become unmanageable.

My reaction to everything was to eat and to eat in private. I would find myself waiting until hubby would leave the house and then I would drive over to the Burger King and get a couple order of fries and stuff them in my mouth as fast as possible. I didnt care what the food was as long as I could stuff myself and stop the feelings I was having. Sometimes it would be a half dozen Tim Hortons doughnuts or it could be any kind of candy and bags of it. I was a closet eater and would hoark down as much as I could as fast as possible.

My journey is just beginning and everyday is a struggle to not have a binge. I am finding ways to deal with the emotions and feelings that are causing me to binge. When I am tired, happy, sad, angry, just about any emotion gets me to wanting to binge if I dont keep my meals regulated. I am always in fear that I will relapse. I am noticing that the binges now make me physically ill when I am finished. I am also have feelings of being "high" and then a crash that just knocks me down for a couple of hours. I dont remember feeling that way before and that is probably because I was constantly bingeing.

I find trying to figure out this addiction and its cycle fascinating. I am so curious and wanting to learn and finally be free of my addiction but I really dont think I will ever be free of it. Perhaps my thinking will change.

I am so glad I found this Thread.
My name is Natalie and I am addicted to fast food.

I have yo, yoed with my weight/body/health for years and could never understand why I keep falling back to the same old habits when I LOVE to work out and feel good when I am in shape. Last week I was reading the #3 challenge when for the first time Bill talked of the chemical addiction to fast, greasy, salty foods. It has been like a light bulb to me. I could not understand how I could work out hard, plan and prepare great meals I like to eat and yet I would feel physically angry and out of control if I couldn't stop for some french fries. Then when I succumbed, I would feel instant gratification.
I am out of control. I recognize now that this is TRUE addiction and it is not okay to "white knuckle" it as you say to free days or "special event treats" etc.
I MUST STOP.

I need help, I know I cannot do this alone. I am scared to fail. AGAIN!

I worked out hard this morning, I made it home safely, so far so good, I am writing my feelings down. I want to be free from this addiction that hinders my emotional, spiritual and physical progress.

Now I need to figure out step 2.

Thia... you are always such a light in this community shining into dark corners without hesitation, or ok... maybe with some hesitation but with real courage to face your struggles and it is inspiring... I will work the 12 Steps along with you, I will return to post Step One fully, I have only recently hit my bottom with sugar addiction... and just posted this on another addiction thread here... here is my start and my summary of right now, in surrende to the very much unwanted state of powerlessness... there was some sharing and debate about the real nature of sugar addiction, with some folks committed to managing it and some committed to abstaining, on the thread where I first posted this...

Sugar addiction is real and serious... not everyone who abuses sugar, or uses it when they would rather not for caloric or health reasons is an addict, however... we are all made so that our systems overreact to refined carbs and crave more, it is in our brain chemistry... Chris W. made a wonderful video about "excitotoxins" and you can also look it up on the web, interesting research about how sugars and refined product are literally MADE with chemicals that disregulate appetite... now that is a good reason to avoid in my book, addict or not.

I am, however, a sugar addict... how do I know? Because for one, I have been in recovery from alcoholism for many years, and the symptoms of hiding, obsessing, sneaking, avoiding, changing "brands", shame, guilt, loss of control, fear of being around it, hoarding it so as to not run out, eating in the car and eating it fast and stuffing... all of it, are symptoms of addiction. Only recently have I accepted this, because I KNOW enough to KNOW that the only successful treatment for a true addiction, is surrender, abstinence, God, and a lifetime commitment to the spiritual changes it takes to sustain recovery... it goes without saying that there is not a time when "a little" will be safe. Can't "dose" alcohol to an alcoholic either, though it makes "sense" that it "should" work.

So my friends, I really enjoy the variety of experiences here, and the generous suggestions, thank you for starting and continuing this thread.. it has only been a week since I surrendered, though it has been a lifetime of efforts of different varieties that last a certain length of time. I remember when I was first in recovery from alcoholism, I was not strong, I did not quite know how to BE in my own skin, but the FEAR went away because I was no longer playing with fire. Do I miss it, yes sometimes I still do. I do miss sugar, a lot. And I cannot afford to live in that tiny tiny little cycle of a trap for the sake of a white powder or a liquid solvent. The FEAR of being around sugar, I look forward to when that goes away... it's pretty powerful still.

I am saying this all out loud as much for myself as anything, to keep me on the track of low low carbs and high protein this week, the shift has taken away my cravings, and the surrender has taken away my excuses, and God is working out the kinks in my mind and heart... how can something so toxic be something we fall in love with and stay with no matter that there really ARE no good consequences?
As for me, I can rationalize my way into most anything... and man, it feels so good to just give that up.

Thanks for listening... I'll keep coming around anywhere that folks will talk honestly about this... love this community, we can do what we need to do, together.

Blessings, Trish

Zina, thank you for sharing your first step with us. Sounds like you are becoming more and more aware of the effects of the additction on you.

Natalie, thank you for sharing your story with us and Im with you this food addiction is the same as any other chemical addiction to alcohol or drugs, etc, just in the form of food, which is rough because we all need food. You are on your way to recovery with admitting you have an issue with it, stick with us as we work through the steps. Step two is on its way

Trish, thank you for sharing your story of addiction with food with us, it sure helps others. Yes, I too am an alcoholic and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I cannot not even have a little or it sets off a chemicial reaction within my body and I cant stop! Sugar and refined carbs are having the same effect on me

Update on my step one, I did take a bite a couple weeks ago and lo and behold I fell off the abstinence again, I stayed off the sugar and refined carbs for 2 weeks and now it has been a couple weeks since I feel off again. So I will be moving onto step two later today and am surrendering again....it has been 2 days since I have been clean from the substances again.