So I was going to share this post with my groups. Then I thought, wouldn't it be cool if everyone could post a fear that needs to be faced? Maybe the community could help you face it head on. If you are new to t-com you are about to find out just how powerful & supportive we all are. We are here for YOU.

Ok I'll start:

I did it! I faced one of my greatest fears head on & I won!!! As a teenager I’d want to do the girly thing; chat on the phone w/ my 1 & only friend. I would ask for permission & would get hit w/, “You think you are so important that you can disrupt other peoples life’s by sitting on a phone”? Then came a time I realized my calls were recorded & used against me. So no, I am not a fan of phones. Infact, I rated phones worse than the bathroom scale!
Anyhow, months ago I challenged myself to face the phobia. I announced to my t-com friends that I was going to call everyone who had given me their number. On that very day Yoly wrote, “Pick Me! Pick Me!” & gave me her number. The catch, she mistakenly wrote, if I’m busy, leave a message & I’ll call you back. Yoly never got the call b/c I did not feel important enough to disrupt her busy day. (on a side note I have called 57 other t-com friends).
Anyhow, to make a long story short, Michael, fitpro, (an other person who intimidated me, in an awww way, lol) had a conference call yesterday afternoon on gratitude. I wrote ahead telling him I might ease drop on the call, but wouldn’t participate. (I was having an insecure day). Turns out that I did participate & it felt so great. (Chip & his wife even joined in for a few minutes. They were at the port o call in Fla. ready for their honeymoon cruise to start).
Anyhow, I am so grateful for Yoly’s daily posts I wanted to let her know & so …. I called Yoly!!! In return she was grateful that I shared how important she is in my daily life, even though I don’t always respond to her posts. So the answer, after all these 40+ years of needless fears is,
"YES! I am important enough to reach out and share myself with others"!!!
My greatest hope is that all parents choose their words wisely in raising children. Please don’t feed them with negative remarks!!!

Anyone else want to share a fear or a success story on fears you already faced?

Thank you Michael for the gift of The Gratitude Challenge. It has changed my life drastically!!!

StarJumps of JOY for YOU, sweet Sherri! I am smiling ear to ear~Thank YOU for sharing...and bringing a huge smile to my heart today!

Keep facing your FEARS!

Much LOVE and Grateful HUGS,
Diane
xox

Thank you Diane. It as great talking to you yesterday. Don't you have a share on fear?

THIS makes me smile! I am sorry you had to go thru the growing up part in that place but SO PROUD OF and FACING YOUR FEAR~~ do you have my number in that phone of yours? LOVE YA!

StarJumps for HHC JOY... here is one Sherri : )

A moment that I was inspired to challenge my personal growth...more specifically my modesty. It was raining that afternoon, so I quickly entered the Y with an added mission to my swim workout (in preparation for my triathlon in HI with Team Leukemia to honor a precious angel), an attempt to conquer a self imposed fear of undressing in a public locker room. The very first time, I strategically positioned my body in a corner, held my breath and courageously ever so quickly got totally undressed to jump into a swimsuit in a locker room...so very proud of my stellar accomplishment, I zipped through my swim workout with bubbling torpedo speed, jumped out of the pool and headed back into the dressing room...yikes, only to discover that all my belongings were actually in the men's locker room...yep, spring 2008 super-modest Diane inadvertently/innocently quickly stripped down in the men's locker room as God, with his infinite sense of humor, challenged my fears and my super-modesty! In a way I was a "changed woman." The life guards who rescued my clothing also had a great time with the comedy of the situation. My special friends dear to my heart also had great fun hearing about this and laugh again whenever they remember...especially, since I was still battling my fear of men.


Love and Hugs,
Diane
xox

Thank YOU Sherri!!!! This is great!!! I am so happy for you! I am smiling as I type this. (I'll come back to this site when I don't have a migraine I'm fighting)

Love You!
-Terri

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diane StarJumps for HHC JOY... here is one Sherri : ) A moment that I was inspired to challenge my personal growth...more specifically my modesty. It was raining that afternoon, so I quickly entered the Y with an added mission to my swim workout (in preparation for my triathlon in HI with Team Leukemia to honor a precious angel), an attempt to conquer a self imposed fear of undressing in a public locker room. The very first time, I strategically positioned my body in a corner, held my breath and courageously ever so quickly got totally undressed to jump into a swimsuit in a locker room...so very proud of my stellar accomplishment, I zipped through my swim workout with bubbling torpedo speed, jumped out of the pool and headed back into the dressing room...yikes, only to discover that all my belongings were actually in the men's locker room...yep, spring 2008 super-modest Diane inadvertently/innocently quickly stripped down in the men's locker room as God, with his infinite sense of humor, challenged my fears and my super-modesty! In a way I was a "changed woman." The life guards who rescued my clothing also had a great time with the comedy of the situation. My special friends dear to my heart also had great fun hearing about this and laugh again whenever they remember...especially, since I was still battling my fear of men. Love and Hugs, Diane xox

THANKS FOR SHARING THIS.

Hi Sherri I will come back to read all the replies, but I had to reply. I have different reasons but I'm a phone hater too But it's part of a deeper fear for me.

Thanks for starting the thread and being so open about it I can't wait to read everyone's replies.

Oh my Sherri thanks so much for sharing your story. You made me smile today as well. Please add me to your phone, but being 6,000 miles away you might not want to call me: send me a text message instead. I would love that

+44 7753419943

Love Suzi

Sherry, it has been a pleasure getting to know you in our groups. You can call me anytime! Day or night!

Sherri, my heart breaks for you! I think it was very brave and courageous to make that call, due to the mean things that you were told in the past. When we are young, we tend to take on what we are told by those in a position of authority as the truth. Sometimes it sticks and we carry those hurts into adulthood. I sure had some growing up.

My fears of public speaking, being ridiculed, etc. were addressed a lot in college. Now my biggest fear is stairs. Falling down last year was the worst thing in the world for me. I posted what happend on my profile, so I won't detail it greatly here, but basically, at the end of a darkened hallway, I opened the door, switched on the lights and stepped forward into an open stairwell. No rails, no nothing. To this day, if I can take the elevator I will. I don't know if I will ever get over it. I freakout over escellators too. I can go up them and hate it, but I won't go down on them. I don't know what I can do to address it. Perhaps small sets of stairs leading to bigger ones? I don't know.

Anyway, congratulations on facing that fear head on.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Diane. I was laughing so hard my dogs are barking at me. I have done similar things. Thank you for sharing this with us. I am sharing my sense of being relieved that I am not the only one to do this sort of thing. Oh gee!!! Oww. My stomach. Too funny. Here's my funniest faux pax so far in life:

One time, I was really, really tired in college and didn't have much sleep. I just finished finals and was exhausted from being up for days, visting my mom in a smaller town in Oregon. I went to the ATM late at night and saw someone in the dark bank He was standing to the side, like he didn't want to be seen or something. The weird thing was that he looked like he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt. I thought that robbers wore beannies but whatever. I wasn't sticking around to find out.

I didn't use the machine and called the police immediately. I told the 911 operator all I had seen as I drove away quickly, because I didn't want to get shot calling from the spot. I was across the street watching and about eight squad cars pulled up. They cased the outside of the bank, and a few minutes later they started laughing and slapping eachother on the back. I got very angry, and immediatley judged them for not being serious about such a dangerous and scary situation. They all drove off, so I went back across the street to the bank, fueled with rightious indignation. What was so funny about a bank getting robbed?

Inside the bank, I saw that the robber actually was a mannequien for their vacation giveaway! That night, I learned that I needed sleep! Sheesh!

Must go defrost turky burgers for dinner.

Love to all.

Jillian

OMGosh! You guys have me rolling!!! My stomach hurts too, from laughter.

Diane I can just feel how mortified you must have been. Thank God, seriously, that no men entered at the time. Or did they, Tee!Hee! I guess if you can live that done you must have met your fear of nudity in public changing areas?

Rebecca, I still only have a house phone. I bought a throw away cell last year for the Denver trip. I used it to call my hubby. Once home, I lost it. Conveniently???LOL!

Thank you Patty! That is the point of this thread. I praise Bill Phillips & my t-com family for all my accomplishments. Without you guys I would still be on a couch as a wasted piece of space. I was such a mess when I started here. I am so changed for the good. I'm almost a "Stepford " movie in the making. LOL!

Ready_ Set_Go! Care to share? You can email me in private if you want. If you think this site is a blessing (& it is) you should be open to actually converse w/ these members. I shook so bad w/ my first call that I hung up before the person could answer. They had caller ID & called me right back. To top it off this person talked to my answering machine! Stating, "I know you just called me, pick up". That's crazy!!! I could be your first baby step. No pressure, just an offer.

Erin, I thank you for your support. Life is really, really good!

Jillian, I remember meeting you in Denver last year, just after your fall. You were still black & blue! I sure don't have the answer for you, but getting comfortable w/ small staircases might be a good start? Maybe porch steps? I can only speak for myself. When I come across an other stumbling block I have learned to attack it head on. This is why in the last 2 years w/ t-com I have grown. I refuse to waste any more of my life. I want to live & be free of fear.

Suzi, you are always in my corner! If I learn how to text & get a cell phone again,...I promise you'll get my very first text message.

You guys really made my day & I thank you so very much for sharing.

Thank you Sherri for finding the courage not only to turn and face your fear but to share it with all of us in such a heartwarming way. Gratitude unlocks so many long boarded shut doors. It awakens us to our truth.

Allow me to share a long held fear of mine that I was able to finally face.

I grew up with a paralyzing fear of the water. I was intensely hydrophobic. I believe my fears stemmed from early childhood when my Dad would wash my hair in the kitchen sink. He would force my head under the faucet and allow the water to pour down into my eyes and mouth. The sensation of drowning would overcome me and I would begin to panic. He found humor in this and would repeat it whenever he washed my hair.

I was never taught to swim. Whenever we would vacation or take trips to the lake I would either stay on shore or venture out only waist deep. My fear of drowning was gripping. I had recurring nightmares about drowning.

When I was 13 or 14 I worked for a local ice cream shop during the summer. A couple of friends/co-workers and I went to the shop owners home one afternoon to hang out by his pool. I never told my friends of my fear, but I stayed clear of the pool's edge until they decided to have some fun with me and toss me into the deep end. I pleaded with them not to do it. I told them I couldn't swim but they thought I was just trying to avoid getting wet so they heaved me into the pool laughing all the while. Here I was, my worst fears being realized. I thought for certain that I was going to drown that day. I was in a panic and walking on the bottom of the pool. One of my friends suddenly realized that I wasn't kidding and jumped in to pull me out. I got a death grip on him. He told me afterwards that he feared I might cause us both to drown, but he managed to pull me to safety.

That incident only further strengthened my fear.

Some years later I was involved with Army ROTC while enrolled at Central Michigan University. Part of the course requirement to become a Commissioned Officer was to attend a 6 week long ROTC Advanced Camp. I would be sent to Ft. Lewis, Washington where I would go through a series of Military Training Exercises including a Physical Fitness Test that involved swimming as well as some other very challenging water obstacle exercises. I would be asked to climb an 80 foot tower, zipline over a lake and drop down into the lake before the shoreline. I would also be required to climb a 30 ft. tower, shimmy out on a rope, do a series of pullups and then drop down into the lake below. Can you imagine how petrified I was at the thought of all of this?

A few months prior to my scheduled departure I arranged a meeting with our commanding officer who was a Lt. Colonel. I explained my situation to him and told him that I would not be attending the required training. He informed me that if I were to opt out of the training I would not be commissioned and would be asked to leave the program. He encouraged me to face my fear, overcome it and attend the training as scheduled. After much deliberation I decided to enroll in a swimming class on campus. Through that class I was able to finally develop enough confidence in the water to attend the ROTC Advanced Camp.

I successfully completed the swimming portion of my physical fitness test along with the Lake obstacles and a river crossing. My fear of water had been significantly diminished.

To this day I am not the strongest of swimmers. A residual fear of water still exists, but it does not have the power over me that it once had.

Thank you Michael for sharing this story of fear. I'm really impressed that once again you have proven to me what the power of our minds can do. You met your challenge head on & won.
I'm sorry your dad did that too you. The things they think funny can be so damaging. I suppose it was probably your facial expressions & the gasps for air that tickled his fancy. Whatever! The more I learn from & about you the more impressed I am. You are a hero to me.
Thanks again for sharing.

Thanks Sherri for the post, I read you all and thank you so much for sharing.Calling 57 people that is a lot of people!

My fear.... the one emerging right now... beeing manipulated by others.... Facing that one straight on right now.

Anniexxx

My fathers job, working for the government, transferred him every year and a half...So I attended 10 schools. I started school at age 4 and so I was a year younger and smaller that everyone in my class. Moving cost money and there was n o left over money for clothes. Most of mine came from the Salvation Army, until I learned to sew. Every school was very different than the rest. I had nightmares over homework that I was behind in, usually math. I skipped whole sections of learning because of moving. As an adult , I bought an adult math course to get everything in chronological order. I became a book worm in school,. I could hide behind a book and not think about my life. The people in the book were nice, interesting and I did not have to interact with them.

I was terrified to walk into a class room of strangers. I still am. Kids treat you like you are stupid if you do not know everyone, or everything that is being talked about or gossiped about. At home, I was very protected and naive. My parents never allowed us to go anywhere or hang out with kids because they did not know who they were and assumed we'd end up with the "wrong" crowd....so I never was able to get close to anyone. I had no idea what small talk was or how to interact with people. None. I still get bouts of terror in a room full of people. I was made fun of, even by teachers. I became very introverted. I stayed that way most of my life. I became a foster parent and tried to help children in transient homes to get a sense of stability. This was the beginning of my healing. I had to help others become self confident.

I am comfortable as a behind the scenes person. I run sound and do tech work for a band and for church. I venture to do my job running sound so well that no one will notice the sound person. I don't like to get noticed and get very embarrassed if I am.
My mother was too busy with 5 kids and moving.. for friends, so I never had an example.

I was very shy. For some reason that attracted my husband to me. He grew up in a very coarse, loud family. He could not understand my fear at ALL...I could not understand his outgoing nature, except that he never made fun of my shyness.
My husband is beloved by every one. He can talk to anyone about anything with or with out information. He taught me to think about 3 areas of a persons life (for instance, job, family, hobbies) (he taught our kids too) and 3 questions about each of those areas, and then begin with one question. Usually that will start the ball rolling. At first I felt like I was being nosy or would be made fun of for asking. . When my husband does it, he sounds like he is truly interested. People like to talk about them selves.
After being a stay at home mom, I forced myself to get out of the house after our youngest daughter grew up and moved away.. I got the front desk job at our local YMCA. I could play the roll. I smiled. I was friendly and did my job well. Next I was asked by a friend to work at her foot doctors office. I started using my husbands method to help the patients to be comfortable and no longer nervous. One on one with people, I am getting better. I can still get uncertain when I walk into a whole room of people I don't know. I force myself to do it. I try to find the person who looks the way I feel and walk up to them and start a conversation. Usually I find they are so grateful to not stand awkwardly alone that I have no trouble.

Being on T.com and has taught me that we are all the same in our struggles. Everyone on the outside may look like they have it all together, but each one has fears, hurts, habits and hangups. I have learned to see that in others now. It has brought out a compassion in me for people and helped me to take the focus off of my awkward self, to reach out and love others. I learned that even though I considered myself shy and picked on, I had been focused on my self and not on others. I was SELF CENTERED... When I discovered that I was in shock. I was the victim in my own mind.
I have stopped being that victim. I have begun to be others centered. I try not to even think about myself and my circumstances except to be grateful for EVERYTHING!!

Hi Sherri I have to confess this is not my cup of tea. Fear of things truly dangerous is not foolhardy. On the other hand fear of things that only represent some danger not tangible or present is limiting and destructive. So there is always the need to discriminate the real from the imagined. It is not as easy as it might first appear. The line often blurs.
The fear I face almost daily is severe diabetic reactions. They stack up in the mind as things to avoid. Many of them seem like slow implosion. Driving thirst no amount of water can quench, fatigue so severe as to make exhaustion seem energetic coupled with a bought of emotion that stirs grief or anger, blurred vision and a general loss of control of my situation of the moment. In short they are horrendous. When I was diagnosed my blood sugar was 500 mg/dl on the report it had critical next to the reading Now type two diabetes is a disease of the “fork” its controllable by diet. Over the many years that I have worked my way through these challenges I have done well. No insulin injections, no diabetic drugs, no drugs of any kind. I dealt with diabetes with food and fasting. Sounds great but it came at a price. I feared getting out away from the house and my medicine -”food”. If error with food I was home I could rest if I went into a diabetic collapse. Over the last three years I’ve over come much of it. I’d go out and row for 2 plus hours at a time. I’d bring water. Somehow if I was rowing moving my body I could not just clear my blood of excess sugar but also make my body more insulin sensitive. All to the good but the old images continue to haunt and I’d make provision for there remedy even though I have reversed much of my condition. It is like the tiger that is born and lived most of its life a cage one day the door swings open it could go free yet to the tiger it sees nothing but the shadows of the bars even though they are gone. So I assess my state and test new limits likes speaking in public, something I have never enjoyed and always caused me angst, yet just last week I did it and did it well and enjoyed it to boot. Now I am comfortable away for the day and enjoy seeing old friends and generally going around town. Last year I flew to L.A and handled it well. Encouraged I flew to Hawaii and stayed with a friend again I succeeded and did well Now the next big reach through a new limit is traveling with my wife to LA and then on to Mexico for a week. I am still work in progress. Sometimes I am haunted by the old images and the mind saying “ what are you thinking of you could get into serious trouble in a foreign country where you don’t speak the language” Then there is a blur of scenario and solution as all the gears turn and the mind works its “magic.” There is just one short coming to this mental parade. Nothing has happened yet. Why solve situations that have not occurred. In moments when I get on top of the phenomena I smile because just because the mind serves up thought I don’t have to believe them. That is what a mind is for -to serve up thought. My mission is to live fully here and now. Not in some hasn’t happened “later.”
So that is the big fear Sherri and like most “real” fears they are just the ghosts out of the past put into the present by a mind. ~ david

Annie, being manipulated is a tough one. The more you apply yourself to your assignments & the community connection; the more you'll realize just how strong you are. I've enjoyed watching your progress so far. Stay strong & true to yourself.

Lynn, I applaud you for ditching the shy girl and living the new life you have chosen for yourself. Pouring your compassion onto others to block your own thoughts of insecurity is a great way to face your fears. You do it so well. You are the change we need in the world today!

David, If I had to choose one person who is so diligent on exercise & health issues, I'd have to choose you. I'm grateful to be in your group and to learn from you. You always have words of wisdom that I can draw from such as, "Why solve situations that have not occurred" or "The hand controls the fork". You go with the flow & quietly push yourself forwards. I hope you enjoy your travels. You so richly deserve them. Congrats on facing your fear head on & reversing your diabetes!!!

Way to go Sheri! So proud of you!

Chris

Thank you Chris.