Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:


1) I know I am capable of so much more! I have settled for less than my highest potential. I am tired telling myself that there will always be a better time to improve. The time is now!

2) I want to finally achieve my fitness goals. I have reached a certain level of fitness, but then I tend to stay there. I am after the highest level possible for me. I want to go all the way!

3) I don't want any regrets! I want to make the most out of my life. I want to make a lasting impact.


In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:


1) Humbleness

2) Gratefulness

3) Strength


Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:


1) Making excuses! I recently realized that I make a lot of excuses for not doing the things I know I could be doing to make changes!

2) Worrying about what other people will say or think. I am at the point now that I could care less!

3) Not believing in myself.



Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:



1) I am in really good shape. But I want to add some muscle and strength.

2) I feel strong.

3) I have a few injuries that I am working around right now.



Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:


1) 18 weeks from now, I will have achieved my goal of finishing this challenge. I will know what it feels like to set a goal and reach it.

2) 18 weeks from now I will have an even more clear vision of where I am going and what I will do next.

3) 18 weeks from now I will have faced the things in my life that are holding me back. I will have dealt with them and I will be in a new place.


Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:


1) Forgiveness

2) Peace

3) Gratitude


Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:


1) I will not beat my self up. I will be happy and grateful for who GOD made me to be.

2) I will not give in to fear.

3) I will be bold and confident.



Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:


1) I will be 10 pounds lighter. (Or more)

2) I will be stronger.

3) I will be leaner.

Assignment #1 Worksheet: Where Are You Now? Where Are You Going?

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the
decision to transform my health and life are:
1) I have worked long enough with out reaching my final goal.
2) It is time to Finally start and finish something with the stated/desired results. Not just completing it.
3) I want to be ready for the next challenges in my life. God has a plan, he wants to know I am ready to recieve the blessing
In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been
experiencing are:
1) I will never get this done. Others make it look easy, My body just won't respond.
2) If I don't get my weight and health under control, I will not be able to move on to other things
3) Why do I keep doing the work with out seeing the results
Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the
past are:
1) Something is wrong with my genetic make up that does not allow me to acheive the weight and health goals.
2) I am working hard enough to get the results I want.
3) I can cheat with diet and excerise and make it up another time.
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Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:
1) I am 233 lbs and 28% body fat according to my scale at home
2) My blood pressure is controlled by 3 medications and was last recorded at doctor as 170/100
3) My lab results show I have borderline cholesteral and Blood sugar problems
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Assignment #1 Worksheet: Where Will You Be In 18 Weeks?
Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more
aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:
1) I will have achevied my goal and will be working with my brother and others to help them acheive theirs
2) The positive energy from my transformation will be evident in my work.
3) I will be using this transformation as the spring board to other transformations needed in my life
Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which
describe what I’ll be experiencing are:
1) I have reached the goal and setting new goals for health and well being
2) I can feel God working in my life, to use me for his glory.
3) I know how to set goals and accomplish them. Not just wish and hope
Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy
changes for the better will be:
1) Working to my maximum and beyond every work out is the standard.
2) The plan I am working, gets the results I want regardless of genetics.
3) There is no desire or room not to be disceplined with diet and excercise.
page 1 continued on page 2
Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved
condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:
1) My weight is 200lbs or less.
2) My blood pressure is controlled with much less or no medication.
3) My lab results indicate that everything is in the healthy range.
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Heart and Soul

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:

1) I’m not finished with the work I’ve started

2) I feel better emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually

3) I am of absolutely no use to others when I am not my personal best in everyway, and my life is in dedication to helping others.

In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:

1) Deep worry over my youngest son

2) Inward frustration that I am stuck on a plateau in achieving my goals started in Jan 2011

3) Hope that I did it before and belief in myself I can do it again successfully

Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:

1) Rumination over things my son does that I cannot change

2) Kidding myself that I am following the program and realizing I am using light cream in my coffee, etc., wondering why I am not dropping weight

3) Recurring fear of climbing into the deep water for the sprint distance triathlon I have signed up to do

Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:

1) I am 23 lbs over the weight I should be for my height by medical standards

2) My body fat percentage is about 2% higher than it should be for my age

3) My current BMI of 25.5 is just into the overweight category

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:

1) I will stop myself from self-deprecating humor when I hear it come out

2) When my worries surface for my son, I will release the worries so I am free to receive the hope of a better future for him

3) I will be more honest with myself about things I am doing that undermine my success

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:

1) Serenity

2) Contentment

3) Pride

Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:

1) I will have come closer to living the Serenity Prayer trying to attain the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference

2) I will cut off verbal abuse from my son instantly

3) I will look in the mirror and feel pride and inner contentment at what I see back

Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:

1) I will weigh 145 lbs or less

2) My body fat percentage will decrease by at least 1.5 percentage points or more

3) My BMI will be be within a normal range and 24 or lower.

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:


1) I've completed my current goals and without setting new ones I'm drifting. I've already gotten a little soft around the edges, and I have been lax about weight training for a few months. I want to live up to my potential, reach higher, grow more.

2) I want to inspire Autumn to reach for her best potential. We came a long way in 2011, but there are still adventures to be had that are not yet within reach.

3) I want to revisit what I learned last year, reconnect with the feelings of victory and inspiration and refine what I learned. I still know what I learned, but I want to practice what I know. I want to reaffirm my whole health as an important priority in my life.


In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:


1) COMFORTABLE. I'm not reaching for anything, and that's not good. I need to stay challenged and active and engaged.

2) I have gotten irritable more often than normal, and often for minor things that probably should not upset me as much as they have.

3) I've felt some doubts about my commitment to the challenge, even though I've proven to myself before that I can meet that challenge. I fear I'm missing a powerful enough "why" to stay on track.


Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:


1) I'm healthy enough the way I am. I don't need to be perfect. I also don't know what to reach for as a goal. Do I really need 6-pack abs?

2) If I progress too far, too quickly, will I discourage Autumn from continuing on her fitness journey?

3) Getting my finances and house in order are more important to me than lifting weights--I can let the exercise slide.



Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:



1) My weight after fasting is 195 lbs as measured by a health professional. My bodyfat is 19.2% as measured by a handheld BEI device.

2) My total cholesterol is 167. LDL is 107 and HDL is 41. Triglycerides are 96, blood sugar (fasting) is 88. Finally, my blood pressure is 94 / 64 (yeah, seriously).

3) My before picture shows my present condition, including a soft body and poorly defined musculature.



Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:


1) I am taking on even more challenges that would have scared me a year ago. I have done at least one thing that terrifies me.

2) I am helping Autumn to reach her potential on her terms. I am her partner to assist and support her, but I allow her to walk her journey on her own. We have done at least one outdoor adventure that would have seriously strained Autumn's capabilities at the beginning of this challenge.

3) I feel strong and confident. I have made a difference in my own life and in the lives of those who have walked this journey with me. I have reaffirmed that I value my health and that I live according to my values.


Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:


1) I feel challenged and filled with purpose--not too comfortable, but not overwhelmed.

2) I am in tune with a zen mindset, easily dismissing feelings of irritability by better recognizing what I can, cannot, should and should not do. I will be more proactive and less reactive.

3) My silly fears are now irrelevant because I've completed the challenge with results I can feel proud to own.


Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:


1) There's no such thing as "too healthy." My commitment to nutrition and exercise is part of the balance that defines who I am, and I honor that commitment.

2) I have not abandoned Autumn, because I have not allowed my ego to lead the charge. The fitness of my body is something I alone must own, and the health of my relationship with Autumn need not be entangled with it. I have recognized the unhealthy attachments behind my original fear and I have released them.

3) I have brought my life and goals into a better overall balance, eliminating the temptation to abandon or delay some priorities like exercise to favor other priorities that felt lacking in attention.



Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:


1) By the end of this challenge I will be leaner, lighter and stronger than ever before. I will weigh around 180 lbs, and my bodyfat % will be 10% or less.

2) My bloodwork shows an improvement in all measurements, particularly increased HDL cholesterol.

3) My after photo shows well defined and muscularly balanced physique, and those 6-pack abs I didn't really need are visible anyway because I did the work and I was consistent.

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:


1) I am so tired of my own self made pity party. I am always sick, tired, depressed, and am addicted to food and cigarettes. I am mentally ready to deal with these issues

2) I want to finally be healthy. I want to be able to run without losing my breath or having chest pains. I want to wear nice looking clothes without worrying about my belly sticking out or any other part of me. Most of all I want to be around for when my son gets older.

3) I want to show everyone I know that it is possible to do the things you want to do, ie. lose weight, get mentally fit, quit smoking, if you put your mind to it.


In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:


1) Self loathing. I dont like anything about myself. I feel that I am a fat lazy worthless pig.

2) Scared about my health. Everytime I turn around it seems as though something else is wrong with me. I think if I take off the weight the problems will fall right off with it.

3) Embarrassed to go out in public with my family. My husband is into bodybuilding and my son is also active. I feel horrible being the fat frumpy wife who is doing nothing about the problem just complaining about the problem.

Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:


1) I dont have the energy and I'm always tired.

2) I have too many health issues to exercise ie. asthma back problems etc.

3) Its just easier to sit and do nothing.


Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:



1) I weight 206.6 in the morning. I am 5'8 so this is obese by US standards. My waist is 38 in.

2) My cholesterol is in the normal range but the LDL is high. My blood pressure runs anywhere from 138/99 to 177/110.

3) See my photos for current visual on present condition


Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:


1) I will be a more positive influence in my family and friend's lives and everyone I come into contact with. I hope to share my experiences so that others can change as well.

2) I will have positive self esteem and self worth which will directly impact my daily life and how others see me.

3) I will continue to learn and challenge myself because this will all become second nature to me. This will make life a more fulfilling experience.

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:


1) I will feel better about myself and be an overall happier person.

2) I will have the confidence to keep pushing forward even when things get tough.

3) I won't feel bound to my negativity.


Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:


1) I will make sure to keep pushing forward even when it feels hard to do.

2) I will prove with my results that diet and exercise can cure most ailments.

3) I will try every day to exercise and eat right because the better I feel the more I accomplish.


Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:


1) In 18 weeks I will be 40 lbs lighter. My midsection will be 29in.

2) My LDL cholesterol will be lowered to optimal level. My blood pressure will be under 120/80.

3) My after photo will show muscle tone and definition and I will look happier as I feel better about myself.

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:


1) I want to be alive

2) I want to be happy and healthy inside & out. I want to have more to give to myself and others.

3) I want to make my dreams come true instead of being daydreams.

4) I'm DONE allowing myself to be miserable.


In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:


1) determination - NOW is the time to do this....there will be no better time.....only wasted time if I don't take action.

2) grateful for change - for possibility

3) fear

4) loneliness


Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:


1) I'm not worth it

2) I'm broken

3) A negative mindset full of worries. I thought I was following the boy scout motto - Always be prepared....but I was always preparing for the worst.



Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:



1) I weigh 147 pounds

2) too much fat in my mid-section as can be seen in my before photos

3) my measurements are -
Right arm - 11 inches
Right leg - 20 1/2 inches
Neck - 13 1/2 inches
Waist - 35 1/2 inches
Chest - 35 1/2 inches



Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:


1) I will be my best ally rather than my own worst enemy

2) I will continue to find inner peace and happiness. I will feel good about myself and accept myself for who I am. My heart will be filled with love and joy.

3) I will continue to learn about food and cooking. My family will benefit from that by having the opportunity to explore new things along with me.

4) I am committed to continual improvement - Kiazen


Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:


1) LOVE ~for myself and others

2) An attitude of gratitude

3) Laughter


Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:


1) Continuous improvement is a life long journey

2) I have the ability to change/ examine my thoughts, beliefs, and habits to recognize ones that are helpful and healthy. I will nurture the good things instead of focusing on what isn't.

3) I want to give my body what it needs so I can have the energy and ability to go explore and have the adventures I want. Food isn't the enemy - it should be enjoyed!



Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:


1) I will have lost 15 pounds to bring my weight to 132

2) My after photo will show a leaner and stronger me.

3) I will be 8 inches less in my measurments

~will finish in a bit....have to go get the kiddos from school ok - done!

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:


1) To be a happier me. I am always fighting inside myself with negativity and I want to allow myself to trust people and love myself.

2) To be a healthier me. I want to finally give up my addiction to unhealthy foods. I want to be strong enough to go canyoneering, hike the Grand Canyon, go crazy caving, and long strenuous hikes with my hubby.

3) To shine with love and confidence to everyone around me. I want to be the beam of light to everyone I encounter. I want to remind them it's okay to love and be loved. I want to inspire as many people as possible so they can be healthy and happy too. I want to give my love away!!!!!


In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:


1) Guilt. I feel bad when I eat unhealthy food. Also, for letting myself down from my last transformation.

2) Unhappy. I'm not happy with myself. The way I look, feel, act. In general, everything.

3) Tired. I'm tired of the constant fight with myself emotionally and being unhealthy physically. I want to have energy that lights up the room like sunshine.


Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:


1) Thinking negative thoughts

2) Not believing in myself

3) Guilty thoughts



Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:



1) Overweight

2) Round

3) Soft



Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:


1) Being positive in mind and heart. I want to be happy with myself, the way I act towards other people, being confident, give my love away.

2) Following my bliss and going back to school to do what I love and help people with nutrition and cooking.

3) Trust people. I want to able to open my heart to people and not worry about being hurt. The anxiety, mostly.


Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:


1) Happiness with myself, how I look, feel, treat other people.

2) Trust with myself and everyone around me. I will be that sunshine light that is so bright, I'll blind ya with it!!

3) Satisfaction of myself. Be proud of myself and capable to do all the physical things that I want to do.


Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:


1) Thinking positive. Stop myself from thinking negatively. Put love in every one of my thoughts and actions.

2) Fully believe in myself. Have confidence that I can accomplish what I dream to do. Know that I can continue.

3) Not feel guilty due to me not eating bad foods because I'll be eating clean and healthy and my body, heart, & soul will make me happy.



Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:


1) Strong and lean. Hike the Grand Canyon. Go canyoneering w/ my hubby. Go on long and intense hikes. Go back packing in the woods.

2) Lose 30 lbs or more or size 8.

3) A healthy and happy glow because I eat healthy and nutritious foods that nourish my body and soul. I will blind you with my sunshine happiness!!!

WHERE ARE YOU NOW?

Heart and Soul
Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:

1. I want to find the real "me" again. I have spent most of my life giving to other people, but often at the expense of myself. I'm tired of being the resentful, cranky, impatient wife/mother that I've been the last few years. I want to rediscover who I am, what I love, what I dream ... and then work to make those dreams come true. I want to live an authentic life that will allow me to enjoy life and every moment that I spend with those I love.

2. I'm tired of letting fear (both conscious and subconscious fear) control my life. Fear of failure, fear of success, fear of what other people will think of me, fear of not being "perfect" ... I'm tired of it stealing the joy, fun & courage out of my life.

3. I want to be role model of health, fitness, energy & a positive mindset for my family. My kids are getting older now (10, 12 & 14) and are about to face many challenges in their life. I want to be a positive example of how to handle pressure, stress & difficult situations with grace, peace & gratitude.

Emotions
In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:

1. Disappointed that I didn't keep my momentum going after completing my first challenge last summer. I felt so good for actually finishing the challenge, and even lost 25 pounds, but then let "life" get in the way of my continued weight loss & inner growth. I do feel hopeful, though, that if I did it once I can do it again (and keep it going this time).

2. Even though I've made some progress since I started on tcom, I still often feel disconnected and isolated from other people. I continue to put up walls & not let others see the "real me".

3. Frustrated and resentful that I put everyone else's needs in front of my own. I feel like I keep "settling" in my life. I haven't been willing to do the hard work to dig deep and figure out what I really want -- or the courage & confidence to do anything about it.

Mindset
Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:

1. Other people's needs are more important than mine. I don't have the time or energy to take care of them and do the work that needs to be done to transform myself as well.

2. I'm getting older and my body doesn't respond like those of someone younger than me. The efforts I will have to take to "change" will be too difficult to sustain for a lifetime.

3. If I can't do it "perfectly", I might as well just give up (and indulge today). I can always start again tomorrow ... or on Monday ... or next month ...

Body
Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:

1. My weight first thing in the morning is 201.5 lbs (at 5ft8in)

2. At my last doctor's appt, my blood pressure was 138/82 (high normal) even with medication. My cholesterol was slightly elevated and moving in the wrong direction.

3. I feel tired, run-down, overwhelmed, cranky & irritable much of the time.

WHERE WILL YOU BE IN 18 WEEKS?

Heart and Soul
Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:

1. I've dug deep and really know who "Kari" is again - and I like her! I'm feeling more confident in myself and have started to take action towards my newly identified goals and dreams.

2. I am no longer controlled by fear and feel free to be me! When I feel emotional discomfort, I identify my fears, feel them -- and do it anyway. I am truly living a life of love and purpose.

3. I realize that by taking care of myself (physically, mentally, spiritually & emotionally), I am a much better mom, wife, daughter, sister and friend to others. I am "full to overflowing" so that I have much more to give to others. I am enjoying every moment with my kids. I feel so much less stressed & overwhelmed, and instead make time to laugh, talk & play together! They look to me as an example of a healthy, balanced & happy life.

Emotions
Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:

1. LOVE - I will feel and express love to myself by taking care of my physical, mental, emotional & spiritual needs. I will be so overflowing with love that I will naturally extend it to family, friends & even strangers I meet on the street.

2. RECONNECTED to myself, God, my family and friends.

3. PEACE from knowing that I'm being my authentic self and living my best life. I will be fit and healthy and be emotionally prepared for anything life throws my way.

Mindset
Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:

1. Taking time to take care of me doesn't take away from others -- it is actually a way of GIVING them the best possible me. Eating nutritious meals, exercising & completing the assignments will allow me to handle all of the other activities in my life in a more peaceful and effective manner.

2. I need to FEEL my emotions in order to deal with them and let them go. It may be painful at the time, but eating to "stuff down my emotions" only makes me feel worse in the long run. I have found much healthier ways to deal with my stress and it actually makes me feel better.

3. Perfection is impossible! Consistently taking babysteps in the right direction will ultimately get me to where I want to go. Slow and steady will win the race!

Body
Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:

1. Within 18 weeks, I will be 25 lbs lighter. My weight first thing in the morning will be 176.5 lbs (and continuing to go down).

2. My blood pressure will be 120/80 (or better) using minimal medication (still may have genetics in play) and cholesterol will be well within optimal range.

3. I will feel energetic, joyful & at peace with myself and my life. The light will shine through my eyes to the outside world.

Transformation Notes - Assignment #1 2012 Challenge


Assignment #1 Worksheet:
Where Are You Now? Where Are You Going?

Three values for my life, which I hold deeply within my heart are:
1) I desire not to not only lose weight but have optimal health to spend many years with my best friend and the greatest blessing in my life, David, my wonderful husband!.
2) I want to personally develop a healthy mindset regarding relationships, healthy nutrition and exercise. I love helping others and want to be an example of how one can turn their life around.
3) I want to get my body in optimum condition. I have had some physical challenges and I seek to improve my physical condition to it’s best.




In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing can be specifically described with these words:
1) I have been dealing with depression and higher than normal levels of stress, anger and frustration for several months.
2) Fear that I can’t truly reach my goal.
3) Mentally I have to wrap my brain around self-acceptance and body image. I feel that the fear of being unable to accept what I will look like when at my goal weight is part of what is holding me back. (fear of failure and success?)


Three limiting beliefs about my ability to change, which might interfere with my future achievements are (sometimes we can identify these kinds of beliefs by our past behavior:
1) I can’t lose weight and reach my goal.
2) I will never look acceptable.
3) I have trouble with the perfectionist mentality. I want to be able to let go and just enjoy life more.




Three objectively verifiable and measurable statements which reflect my physical condition and health right now are:
1) 181.8
2) Size 16/18 pants Tops 12/14
3) Pictures – Front, Back and Side Talk about a reality check


Assignment 1a
Where Will I Be In 18 Weeks?

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three things that I am doing which indicate that I am more in alignment with my heart-centered values are:
1) I am greatly improved in my physical condition. Energy is high and I feel great.
2) I am eating healthy on a regular basis. I am doing a high protein, moderate carb program. I am taking all my supplements that are necessary due to my gastric bypass.
3) I have developed better relationships with those around me. I reach out on the t.com site but also in day-to-day life.

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’m experiencing are:
1) I have a real authentic confidence and self-esteem. I believe in myself and do not seek approval from others.
2) I feel healthy, happy, and energetic.
3) I am peaceful and less stressed and angry. I have learned the art of time management. I practice self-care including saying no when needed. This reduces stress, fear and resentment.

Three new beliefs about my ability to make changes for the better that are evident from my transformation success so far are:
1) I am calm, confident and happy with a real sense of self-esteem.
2) I am healthy and fit. My lowest weight since I was in my 20’s.
3) I lead by example and show others that they too can be happy, healthy and enjoy life.

Three specific statements which describe the transformation of my physical condition and health, 18 weeks from now, which are objectively verifiable and measurable are:
1) I weigh 160 or under.
2) Size 14 or smaller jeans.
3) Pictures post-challenge that I am proud to post!


My long range goal is to be at my approximate idea weight/bodyfat by my next birthday in September. I haven't been at my goal weight or even close since I was in my early 20's and I think it was for about 5 minutes.

CHAPTER ONE : where i am now ? embarrassed, fluffy/spongy and not happy with myself.
where am i going ? down to 135 #'s, toned and happy to alive and loving life :-)

3 heartfelt reasons to transform health and life:
i am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired
i want to be a healthy example to my family and friends like i used to be.
i want to feel young and alive like i do in my mind.

3 predominant inner feelings:
depressed
frustrated
and feeling pain inside and out.

3 patterns which may have limited me:
i am getting older- whats the point?
i am just going to quit after a while anyways
i just dont have the energy or motivation

3 statements that reflect my physical right now
i am 145.5 #'s of fat and fluff
no muscle tone anymore
i have no energy or motivation-always tired

18 wks from now
i am a healthy good example for my family andfriends
i have energy and motivation
i feel alive and awesome

18 wks inner feelings
proud of myself
very very happy
loving life and loving myself

my body 18 wks from now
i will weigh 130-135
i will have muscle tone
i will look and be energized and so healthy


this is day 3 and i am azazed at how good i am with eating and cardio--gotta get to the weights. only 3 days and i feel better but i am so afriad of falling off or quitting like i always have but i am gonna do it this time :-) i have faith and hope and michael and all my friends :-)

still gotta do the before pics and so not looking forward to that :-( maybe tomorrow ? but i will .

Assignment #1 Worksheet: Where Are You Now? Where Are You Going?

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:
1) I need to be healthier and fitter for my future, my wife and my kids.
2) I have invested a lot of time, effort and focus into my health and I don’t want to backslide into unhealthy times.
3) I need to change my nutrition success from a diet to a way of life and will focus on 18 weeks, and beyond re-enforcing good eating habits.

In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:
1) Disappointment – I have let myself slide a bit over the last short while and I need to re-establish better habits.
2) Determination – To make further progress on my health and general wellness.
3) Appreciation – Of another opportunity to move forward with a group of like-minded, experienced individuals.

Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:
1) I still believe that I am destined to be a big guy
2) I let excuses and “signs” result in justification for poor decisions
3) I am like the dog in “Up” who had a lack of attention – “Squirrel”, as I sometimes move away from what has been successful for me towards the next thing of interest.

Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:
1) On March 5, 2012, I am 261 Lbs and have a bodyfat % of 28.5%
2) I have an aggregate chest, waist and hip measurement of 142.5 inches.
3) My present physical condition is evident in my before photos taken on February 27, 2012:



Assignment #1 Worksheet: Where Will You Be In 18 Weeks?

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:
1) I am consistently following a dedicated workout program that helps me improve my overall health
2) I am consistently following a dedicated nutritional program that has become a way of living
3) I have a strong bond and collective sense of accomplishment with the members of the Transformation Mastery group

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:
1) Satisfaction
2) Pride
3) Desire

Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:
1) I deserve to be healthy and fit
2) I can enjoy and sustain a way of life fueled by healthy eating
3) I am a positive example to my family, friends and co-workers

Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:
1) On July 8, 2012, I will be 241 Lbs, or less, and 23% bodyfat
2) On July 8, 2012, I will have an aggregate chest, waist and hip measurement of 136.5 inches.
3) I will complete my first ever P90X / Insanity hybrid challenge

Well, here I am. It’s nearly 2am on a Friday morning and I find myself tethered to the keyboard struggling to define my Base. Writing isn’t something I typically have trouble with, but inspiration to do so has been in short supply. I need to live up to my end the bargain here. I have to advance something meaningful; otherwise I’m wasting your time and my own. For over 10 years I chased a dream. Now that I’ve finally captured it I don’t know what to do with it. I’m not the first, nor will I be the last. Have you ever wanted something only to discover that once it’s in your possession the magic evaporates? Ah the thrill of the hunt. It’s always the hunt itself that’s so invigorating. That’s precisely why we become childlike in our behavior when we track down our prey. We dance around, celebrate, hold up the trophy for all to see and then throw a tantrum because we soon discover it didn’t hold the key to happiness we thought it might. Don’t start getting too concerned. I’ve been preparing for what I am experiencing right now. I’ll find my way clear of it soon enough.



Right now in this very moment I’m blank. My base is somewhere between where I used to be and where I’m going but I can’t accurately pinpoint where that is because a dense fog has surrounded me. Suffice it to say I’m confused. I could lie to you. I could tell you I have a perfectly clear vision in my mind of where I am and where I wish to be. That would be the easy thing to do. It would certainly be the safe thing to do. It wouldn’t, however, be the right thing to do. If I’ve learned anything over the past two years it’s that I have to be as honest as I can possibly be with myself as well as others. Self-deceptive practices have led to more injury in my life than I care to recall. A little sleight of hand creates just enough distraction to pull off the illusion. Ignore the little man behind the curtain please. Pay attention to the image off to your right and the big booming voice you hear over the loud speaker.


What am I trying to say? Hell I don’t know. It’s now 2:30 on Friday morning and I’ve been typing incoherently for 30 minutes. If I knew what I was trying to say I would have just said it straight out. I suppose the real message I want to convey is “Hey guess what? I don’t have it all figured out and I never will.” It’s ok. It’s very much ok. I’m good with that. I want you to be good with it as well. Don’t ever feel like you need to have all of the answers. When the Sun goes down and you lay your head on the pillow, rest peacefully in the bliss of ignorance. What I need to know is that in spite of myself, as long as God grants me a tomorrow I have an opportunity to be better than I was the day before. I can treat people better, treat myself better, make better choices, and make fewer excuses. That’s how I define progress.


What’s my Base? I’m nowhere. Where is nowhere? It’s NOW HERE.


Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:


1) * I want to be a better person. What does that look like? To me it’s being so radically honest that I can live freely without feeling the want or need to put on a mask. Hey world, this is who I am. My agendas are all right out in the open.

2) * Fearlessness. Living free of all fear. Fear of death, fear of failure, fear of perceptions, fear of loving fully. Freedom from fear is the ultimate liberation. God will provide all of that if I can only find my way to surrender completely.

3) * Unbridled compassion. Most of my life I’ve been unable to feel as deeply as I’d like to. I’ve been so anesthetized for so long that I wonder if the numbness will ever completely wear off. I have more compassion now than at any time in recent memory, but I still encounter situations where I know I should feel something … no feeling emerges.


In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:


1) * Disconnect: I haven’t been in touch with myself. I’ve been forcing things. Old feelings have reemerged; feelings of doubt, anxiousness, unsettledness.

2) * Irritability: When I’m not on top of my game I get snarky. It’s a tried and true defense mechanism. The old cynical and sarcastic Michael. That’s the guy people thought was funny for all of the wrong reasons. I’ll dump on you so I can feel better about me.

3) * Worry: I find myself projecting out into the future wondering what my life is going to look like at 50 and beyond.


Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:


1) * Not good enough

2) * Not happy where I’m at right now

3) * Not learning from past mistakes



Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:



1) * I weigh 151 pounds (what a lightweight … lol)

2) * My body fat percentage is 8.3 (12.5 pounds)

3) * My height is 5’4” (64 inches). I’m taller than Verne Troyer so I’ve got that goin’ for me, which is nice.



Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:


1) * I WILL be more spiritually aligned by virtue of more frequent scripture reading combined with regular meditation and prayer.

2) * I WILL be a more positive person in all areas of my life as a result of less complaining, excuse making, and by using positive affirmations.

3) * I WILL spend more time with my family by unplugging from devices and plugging into Face Time.

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:


1) * Inner Peace

2) * Joy

3) * Strength


Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:


1) * Unwavering acceptance of what is.

2) * Continued unclenching of the heart.

3) * Seeing God in every living creature



Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:


1) * My body will weigh between 145 and 155 pounds … still a lightweight

2) * My body fat will be at or below 6%. Why? Because I feel good there.

3) * My height will be 5’4” (64 inches) because that’s what God gave me. (For the record, I love my stature. I’ve never considered myself short. I’m a giant to my pets … LOL)

Michael, thank you for your honest transparency. We are ALL in this together and it is good to see that you are having similar struggles as the rest of us. hugs to you

Michael - and that's why you are a true champion - in your own life. Your honesty is such a wonderful gift for all of us. Ignore the man behind the curtain lol Thank you for giving me a chance to learn from you. There is no such thing as perfect except in way there is, you are perfect in this moment, learning and growing and allowing us to learn along with you.

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:


1) I do not have the energy and vitality to live out my purpose and I feel disengaged with my life.
2) I want to be a great example of healthy habits for my husband and daughter.
3) I want all facets of my life – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual – to be moving in the right direction rather than one doing better at the expense of the others,

In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:

1) A physical and mental fatigue that is overwhelming.
2) Fear that the change I need to become the best version of myself is outside of my capabilities.
3) Frustration of feeling stuck in the abyss between knowing and doing.

Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:

1) I have too many family and career responsibilities to ever have time for me.
2) I have disappointed myself too many times before to believe this time can be different.
3) It is either all or nothing with nutrition and exercise. A middle approach isn’t good enough.


Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:

1) My weight first thing in the morning is 189 lbs.
2) I wear size 12 jeans.
3) I cannot do any pushups on my toes.


__________________________________________________ __________________________

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:

1) My focus on self-care has increased my energy level so I have more to give myself and others. I am more engaged with life because fatigue does not keep me on the sidelines.
2) My husband and daughter see what the transformation process does for me and start to make healthier changes in their lives.
3) All parts of my life are working together in harmony without struggle because I am in alignment with God and His purpose for me.

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:

1) A physical and mental energy that is restored by healthy nutrition, exercise, and spiritual practice.
2) Confidence that every step I make towards health and wholeness – no matter how small it may seem– is contributing towards my transformation into the best version of myself.
3) Peace that comes from the alignment of thought and action.


Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:

1) Taking time for myself gives me the ability to meet my family and career responsibilities. (“You cannot give what you do not have.”)
2) It does not matter how many times you fall down, only how many times you get up.
3) Proper rest is as important as proper exercise and a free meal occasionally has metabolic and psychological advantages. (pg 61)

Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:
1) I weigh 165 lbs.
2) I can wear my “Cinderella jeans” (size 8) that I have not been able to wear in at least 2 years.
3) I can do at least 10 pushups on my toes.

Heres the beginning of mine.

Click the pick!!!

Assignment 1a & 1b are done! Here is a link to my blog!

Heart and Soul

Having looked inward to do some soul-searching, three heartfelt reasons for making the decision to transform my health and life are:

1. I want to look and feel good
2. I want to live and enjoy every thing life has to offer
3. I'm tired of living in the drunken haziness I've spent the last 10 years in - It's lead to nothing but depression and anger, two feelings I'm tired of carrying around with me. I'm ready to be happy and resentment-free.

Emotions

In recent days and weeks, the three most predominant inner feelings I have been experiencing are:

1. Embarrassed about myself and my drinking habits
2. Frustrated with the lack of support at home to transform
3. Anxious about the unknown.. Do I have what it takes to do this?

Mindset

Three patterns of thinking or beliefs which may have limited my ability to change in the past are:

1. I do not have a drinking problem. People with drinking problems drink everyday. I don't do that, so the problem is not me.
2. It's ok to have a few drinks when I'm stressed, or depressed, or angry..
3. It's not my fault if my husband keeps drinking in front of me.. I'm too weak to resist temptations. It's not my fault I drink; it's his!

Body

Three objectively verifiable statements which reflect my physical condition right now are:

1. No matter how much I work out, my fat percentage is about 32%, and its been stuck there for a while.
2. I run 5 km in 36 mins
3. My present physical condition is evident in my before photo.

Heart and Soul

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, three changes I will have made that show I’m more aligned with what’s important to me at a heart and soul level are:

1. I will be confident in my choices
2. I will look and feel good
3. I will radiate positive energy

Emotions

Looking forward, 18 weeks from now, the three most predominant inner feelings which describe what I’ll be experiencing are:

1. I will feel strong and proud about my acheivements
2. I will be truly happy
3. There will be no room for resentment

Mindset

Three new patterns of thinking or beliefs which expand my ability to make healthy changes for the better will be:

1. I will make healthy choices regardless of what others do
2. Exercise is the best relieve for stress, depression and anger
3. My results will offer proof that I have what it takes to transform

Body

Three objectively verifiable statements which will describe the new and improved condition of my body 18 weeks from now are:

1. My fat % will be down to 25

2. I will run 10 km in 60 mins
3. My after photo will show a healthier, happier me

Exercise is Good Medicine

Three specific exercise benefits I now hold the intention of personally experiencing:

1. Combining cardiovascular exercise alternating with weight training will help me achieve one of my major intentions for the Transformation process and its overall outcome: to age healthfully and independently with reduced risk of disease and an increased sense of well-being.

2. Regular and intelligent weight training will sculpt muscles below the current fat layer, that I intend to melt off, that will make me stronger so I can do things for myself, will stabilize my joints to make them less prone to injury, and as an added bonus, help me to embrace a body that does not leave me feeling embarrassed or ashamed to wear a bathing suit when I go on vacation in May to celebrate our wedding anniversary.

3. Six exercise sessions a week will increase my body's endogenous "happy" chemicals that will leave me with increased physical endurance and a mindset of accomplishment, well-being, and exuberance. It will allow me to try to do one more triathlon.

The amount of time I will make available for exercise each week throughout this 18 week transformation journey

I will continue to do at least three walk-jog, biking, or swimming sessions of 25 to 30 minutes of intense interval training a week for a minimum total of 75 to 90 minutes of cardiovascular exercise a week. On alternate days, I will work with my trainer for 40 to 45 minutes of strength training for a minimum total of 120 minutes a week. Combined, that commits me to a firm minimum of 3 1/4 hrs of quality exercise a week. I will try to add stretching and spot training to my abs for another 30 minutes, though I will consider that a bonus. As the weather gets milder, we will spend time on weekends outdoors doing other fun activities that keep me physically active like kayaking and hiking.

Someone I can share my exercise plan with at the beginning of each week so they can help me be accountable to my goals and intentions is:

My Mastery group, Fearbusters group, and especially Kathy, my AP.