What an interesting thread! I love the saying "What other people think of you is none of your business"! Kind of hilarious if you think about it! But I really understand the hurt when your loved ones refuse to acknowledge your hard work and support you. Been there. If I couldn't eliminate them because they are/were relatives, then I just learned not to count on them. Sad, yes. Now I try to love them anyway and then release my expectations. This is hard too. But it feels better!

=D I didnt even look at the post date, just started responding! LOL! Im so glad that you were able to got through that and do such and AMAZING job in spite of others attepts to bring you down!!! It speaks even more to your determination and will! So when you were named a champion, how did they react? Were they happy for you?? i certainly hope so =D
Have a wonderful day!
Much love,
Harlee

Maggie, it sounds as if you gave it away. That is a great lesson that we can learn here in Bill's Assignments. That surely was one of the monumental ones for me. I still use that lesson DAILY!! We will always face challenges we need to let go off and let them be.

Harlee, there was no response, no acknowledgement and there still to this date has been none. But I no longer feel hurt over it. Instead I feel sadness for them that they have that kind of unhappiness in their lives that they are incapable of feeling happiness for others. I no longer take it personal, it is not my issue any longer, it is theirs. Giving it away is such a freeing experience. I appreciate that lesson Bill gave us so much!! My husband & children were ecstatic though and that is what was so awesome for me. To make them proud by making myself happy was such a blessing for me.
Thank you so much for your support!
Love,
Carolynn

I love when these old threads come up, Carolyn. It seems just like yesterday, doesn't it? I feel sad too that people cannot find happiness to spread around....it must be really hard for them to live in that skin.You are so beautiful and have done such an amazing job. So much growth and beauty inside of you!!!!!!
Love and admire you sooooo much!!!!!!!!

It sure does Sandy. It's amazing how quickly we can grow and move forward with Transformation. I hold close each day that I can move past another challenge and learn from it. I pray for those that have not, that they will some day decide to find the change within themselves.
Love you too!!! I truly appreciate your sweet words.
Carolynn

Quote:

Why is this? We talk, we get along. But they refuse to acknowledge it. I guess my feelings get hurt and I don't understand. I haven't said anything to them about it, nor will I. But I just wondered if anyone else experiences this, how they handle it, and am I being over sensitive that they won't acknowledge my progress. Why do I want that acknowledgment from them. How do I let that go?

Just for the fun of it, since it such an old thread, I will do my what questions I would ask myself in this situation, just in case someone is struggling with a similar issue.....

I bet it is really cool to look back at what you wrote and struggled with a year ago Carolynn....and Joe is pretty funny dragging the old archives out.

Anyway, if I was in the above situation.....these are the questions I would ask myself.

Am I not acknowleding myself and my own success?
Do I not feel good enough and why?
Is there somewhere in my life where I do not acknowledge others?
Is this pattern familiar in my life, is it an old pattern, repeating itself?
How can I create this quality, what I am looking for in my own life - for myself?
Can I give this quality, that I am looking for, away somehow?

Just my thoughts.

Whoa. I read it and I thought, "CAROLYNN posted this????" Wasn't till later I saw it was an old thread. Ahhh.. makes sense now. I learned about you in January, and I gotta tell you, you are so consistent in extending love and kindness and helpful wisdom. It does help to see where you came from though... gives me hope.

Thia, actually I have worked very hard at not being what I didn't like in others. As I travel through my Transformation journey, I try desperately to not give what I get when it comes to negative energy. This was something that I struggled with for so long. When others gave me hate, anger and negativity, I wanted to flood them with it in return. Many times I would do it in subtle digs and comments, but they knew what I was doing. Other times I would just let them have it with both barrells blazing. I just posted about this on Bill's blog.

Recently (this past year) when things have been so great with all the blessings that I have received in my mind, body & soul and the great things Bill has given me, these people still have not acknowledged any of it. To answer your questions:

Yes, I have acknowledged my own accomplishments & success
I feel great because I am constantly learning and practicing
I believe that I acknowledge all for their accomplishments, successes and existance.
It is a familar pattern, but it is no longer my issue. I have learned to not let their lack of love, support or acknowledgment effect me, yet I still offer them love, support & acknowledgment. If they choose to not accept it, that is their issue and their choice. If they chose to mock what I'm doing and try to insinuate we are a cult or some bizarre belief they have, that is there issue, not mine.
You get what you give in most instances. Not from all, but others will make up for where many lack.
I can give this quality away and I do every chance I get.

It is difficult for someone just starting out, who has not been through any of the assignments to not be hurt and effected by Lack of Support by those that they love. Even if they are doing it for themselves, they still feel they need it from the ones that are close to them. Once they begin to learn with the tools provided here, it is easier for them to learn and then practice. As they move forward in this journey, they become stronger and start to realize this needs to be done for themselves and not for others acceptance or recognition. But it sure does feel good when the people you care about, recognize your hard work and let you know it. If you watch my video, my son tells me Mom, I'm so proud of you. I will never ever forget those words. On the radio show, Bill tells me, I'm so proud of you, I will never forget those words. I didn't have to have them to make my transformation valid, but it sure did feel special and it meant the world to me.

Janele, we all hold the power inside to make our lives better. Don't lose that hope or the belief that you can do it!!! You can and you will. From the inside out! You are doing the work and you will be blessed in return!! Take advantage of all the tools Bill provides. He just keeps adding to them too so they never get worn out!!

Quote:

Anyway, if I was in the above situation.....these are the questions I would ask myself. Am I not acknowleding myself and my own success? Do I not feel good enough and why? Is there somewhere in my life where I do not acknowledge others? Is this pattern familiar in my life, is it an old pattern, repeating itself? How can I create this quality, what I am looking for in my own life - for myself? Can I give this quality, that I am looking for, away somehow? Just my thoughts.

Thia! I love this checklist. I need to remember this. Very well said.

And Carolyn, I want to thank you for this thread. I've come back here often and read through it -- it's helped me in a couple of tough times this past year with similar things (and people) in my life. It's not easy to go forward when people are saying hurtful things. Your openness here is a light ahead along the path. =)

Micky forward this to me to read because my sister in law told me I was going to get fat again...just like she did. Upon reflection, I think that she just picked a poor way to voice her disappointment in herself. The fact that she said I would get fat again means that she noticed I was fit: ) Sometimes your interpretation is more to do with yourself than what they are actually saying.

Thanks for forwarding this Micky, this was a great thread!!!!

Misery likes company...bottom line and you no longer are part of that and they feel resentful for that. I agree with everyone else that have posted their thoughts. A good friend of mine is also my boss at the gym where I work and she knew I was doing this challenge and not once during the entire time did she ever compliment me or tell me that she noticed I was losing weight etc. At first it bothered me because everyone else including members would tell me how great I looked and i was making great progress but for some reason she never did. As my friend I would have thought that she would say something. When someone would compliment me she would chime in and say that she lost 10 lbs. She made it about her. I let it go and stop letting it bother me. I did this challenge for ME and ME only and if people noticed and complimented me, great, if not, didnt matter because I knew I was making progress and I felt great about myself and really to me, thats all that matters. You've done amazing and you are proud of that and thats all that matters. xoxo Shannon

My instant "pick me up" when I want to react emotionally to something someone else does or says, "When all is well with my soul, no one can steal my joy". When I ask myself if I'm listening to Divine Guidance and doing my absolute best, all is well with my soul. My frustration, disappointment or tears dissolve and joy takes its place. :0)

Just digging through the archives...a lot of wisdom in this thread!

You are correct Joe. Beautiful wisdom here. Exactly what I needed to read today and I know it will help me work through some family dynamics. Thank you to all that contributed on this thread.

This thread applys to my situation with my friend, who wants to lose weight, but is not committed to the process yet. I had to put her in her place tonight when you called someone FAT, who is about 130 pounds lighter then herself. Unfornately, I may have to distance myself from her because I have worked too hard to let her insecurites and jealousy bring me down with her. True Friends and support networks are happy for your successes and are along the way encouraging you. Joel Osteen, does a great sermon on surrounding yourself with positive people and weeding out the negative people. Worth checking into.

Carolyn,
Congratulations! You Rock and Rock Biiig!!!
Don't base either your happiness or even a small %age of it on what your inlaws are supposed to say to you in regard to anything if it's supposed to be "good". Your Biggest happyness is that you did the "undo-able" for many out there. You didn't need their approval or opinion when you started or while you were working to transform yourself. why should you need it now? The truth is that you don't. If they didn't utter a word. It's their loss. As far as you are concerned : You overcame and that's that. Move on.

Carolynn, I want to give you a hug! Been there. Many times.

It has taken me 34 blasted years to understand that people's issues are just not my problem. There are a million and one reasons why they could be acting that way, but my initial guess would be...they are used to you being the "bigger one" for lack of better term and it threatens them on some level to have you where they are. Why? I wish I knew. I hate that I have to explain to my two daughters, the most politically correct way I can, that sometimes people are envious of something you have that they don't and they turn it on you.

The way I overcome it is by being the best person I can. I treat people the way I want to be treated, I am nice, complimentary, live my life right so that I have no reason to wonder why someone treats me bad except...it's their issue and not mine. I try to examine and make sure I didn't do something, self reflection, but if not, then I let it go.

Trying to understand people is maddening and no matter how much you try, you will NEVER ever make everyone happy! CHIN UP BUTTERCUP!

Wow, I'm so glad I stumbled across this thread. This is the story of my life.
Family members and co-workers who don't mention the obvious changes, I went from size 22 to a 14. That's pretty much ok with me, but it's hard to miss when others around us all can see it and coment on it. I've come to accept that some people just will not make a compliment, end of story.
The other one is harder for me, consistent offers of food. Very large cheddar/jalapeno bages, coconut cream cheesecake, donuts, the list is endless. The stuff is brought to me at my desk, and put right in front of my face, want me to take it from their hand. My kind my insistant refusal isn't enough for them, they want one answer, me taking it and eating it. I sometimes have to take it from them, and go to the kitchen trash can.
It's good to know that there are a lot of us going through the same thing. We tend to forget we're not alone.
Support from each other here will help us make it through the hard times.

Carmen